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Lucas Sucks Ass

Posted on Wednesday, May 19th, 2004

Dave!How do you make the shitty finale to two of the greatest movies of all time suck even worse than it already does? Well, with Return of the Jedi, it's not that hard to do... I mean, you've already diminished the Star Wars franchise to teddy bears and burp and fart jokes... but that didn't stop George Lucas from finding a way. Oh no... when it comes to f#@%ing up movies, Geroge Lucas is the master. His latest shot at blasphemy is igniting a firestorm across the internet and, if it proves to be true, is going to make me very cross indeed.

Lucas Sucks Ass


I've already ranted about how much I loathe Lucas for his inane "prequels" and his tampering with his original Star Wars (HAN SOLO SHOOTS FIRST YOU MORON!) but, as bad as Return of the Jedi is, IT'S NOT EVEN GEORGE'S FILM!! It was directed by Richard Marquand!


At the end of Jedi, Luke saves his father from the Dark Side... meaning that Anakin Skywalker is redeemed and gets to take his place as a Jedi in the "afterlife" (or whatever). THAT'S why Luke sees his father... THE MAN HE JUST RESCUED... standing next to Yoda and Obi-Wan there in Jedi attire.

IT MAKES NO SENSE THAT LUKE WOULD SEE "YOUNG ANAKIN" at the end! I mean, how would he even recognize him? Why didn't Yoda and Obi-Wan reverse in age when they died? Where is the man that Luke saved? Bah. I guess I won't be selling my LaserDisc player anytime soon, since that's the only way I can ever see the Star Wars films when they were any good.

Categories: Movies 2004Click To It: Permalink


  1. Heather says:

    Gak. I refuse to believe this is real. Even George isn’t this stoopid.

  2. Dave2 says:

    Hey, the guy who brought us Jar Jar Binks is capable of ANYTHING! 🙂

  3. Enigma says:

    just when i think he can’t possibly do anything dumber than he already has, he proves wrong. at least he’s consistent. *rolleyes*

  4. Louie says:

    Jar Jar Binks Ruled.

  5. Dave2 says:

    Oh I totally agreed.

    Unfortunately he ruled at sucking ass and ruining the integrity of the Star Wars legacy for the sake of selling toys.

  6. Classified Information says:

    I beleive it is because it shows when the final time the person was not turned over to the dark side before dying. Just a thought.

  7. Kevin H says:

    This post is so old, but I had to tell you why Anakin was shown as a young version – it was because when Darth Vader came to be, he “killed” Anakin as he was. Whatever. Lucas smokes weed. I hope the Clone Wars movie is better than the crap he made after Empire Strikes Back!

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