Over the weekend I started Spring cleaning. Which started with putting out the sonic mole spikes because my underground friends are back, then cleaning out my flower beds (which was no fun for my allergies). And then I progressed into my home, which was neglected most of March while I was working on tons of other things.

The first thing I did was better-organize my freezer. Which, miraculously, always seems to have enough room for new groceries no matter how full it already is. Birds Eye Microwave-Steam-In-The-Bag vegetables were on sale, so I bot a shit-ton of them, then packed them into the bottom of my freezer and put the older stuff on top so I'd use them first...

Oh how I love how economical frozen vegetables are. I'd buy fresh, but frozen (particularly on sale) are so much less expensive, taste amazing, and don't go to waste from spoiling.

From the kitchen I decided to move into the garage. Since the frost is gone, I'll be parking outside so I can set up my wood shop. My goal is always to try and organize things in a way that I can move my tools out of the way and still park indoors at night, but I'm never quite able to get there. This year, I can finally donate all my old kitchen cabinetry, which will open up a heck of a lot of space. So... maybe.

It would be easier if I were the kind of person who can throw stuff out. But I'm just not. I might neeeeeeed it some day. Which is so stupid, but here I am... saving every scrap of wood. But at least I got it organized nicely...

Next I have to organize my tools (yet again) and clear off my work bench. After that... it's tool time.

I need to rebuild my entry closet, build some shelves for my office, and figure out how to build a cat run for Jake and Jenny so they have something new to explore. After that there's no less than 18 projects on my list, which should make for a fun Spring and Summer.

It's the time for April... fools?

Every once in a while I fall down a flat earth rabbit hole, knowing full well that I'll be saying "What the fuck?" at least a hundred times.

And this time around it all started because somebody commented "Nobody believes the earth is flat. You're just being trolled." and I'm like "Holy shit! Somebody actually believes that flat earthers don't exist?!? Obviously they don't get out enough, because flerfers are everywhere, and invest huge amounts of time defending their beliefs with "irrefutable proof" (that's neither irrefutable nor proof).

The insanity surrounding the impending eclipse just makes it all the more mind-blowing. Eclipses occurr where and when scientists say they do because of a model which involves a globe earth. They can literally show you how the calculations work so you can see how they arrive to their conclusions. And yet... people will look at all that and be "Nah, it's flat."

Even when they fail to prove it themselves. As with my favorite flat earth video of all time, which is a whopping one minute and seven seconds long...

Uh huh.

Meanwhile there are people saying that the National Guard being deployed for the eclipse is proof positive of the government knowing it's the End of Days... when, in fact, it's just because the expected influx of people to the totality zone (along with people trying to watch the eclipse while driving) makes for a potentially dangerous situation that local resources simply cannot handle.

And of course CERN has decided to fire up the Large Hadron Collider on the same day of the eclipse to drive the tin-foil hat brigade off the rails.

Now THAT'S trolling. Expert level.

And so we've come to the end of a three-day weekend, and I'm really sad about that, but not so sad that I'm taking a day off from bullets... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• Jolene! Okay... so Beyoncé didn't just cover Dolly Parton's Jolene she changed it in a significant way. Instead of begging Jolene not to steal her man, Beyoncé is warning Jolene to not try and steal her man...

A good cover song comes from making it your own. Beyoncé did that completely. AND SPEAKING OF DOLLY PARTON...

Tina Fey's talent literally knows no bounds. She claims to have gotten the part accidentally because it was shot during COVID and she was the only one around, but the fact that she nailed it anyway is incredibly cool. DESPITE THE FACT THAT SHE CLAIMS SHE DOESN'T DO IMPERSONATIONS...

Yeah, Tina Fey is the gift that keeps on giving.

   
• Ultimate Evil. I don't think I was ever going to be in the mindset to watch the documentary The Truth vs. Alex Jones, but I felt it important to watch so I did. I expected that my takeaway would be sympathy and heartache. It wasn't. It's all-consuming rage. On way too many fronts. Parents who lost their kids at Sandy Hook were already going through hell before Alex Jones started unlashing his fucked up lies and bullshit that had them constantly under attack. He doesn't just deserve to lose all his money, he should be in prison for what he did. Over and over again we hear about how the "absence of trauma helicopters" and how "the parents were acting like actors" was proof-positive of Sandy Hook being fake. How the fuck does any rational human being hear that and say "Yeah, that sounds about right!" and feel justified in screaming at grieving parents? Holy fucking shit. Who needs Satan as a symbol of ultimate evil? We have Alex Jones.

   
• The Willow World! This new Hulu Shōgun adaptation is not the book, but something... else. I've read the novel multiple times and fully admit some of the changes bother me a bit, but most of them do not. The series is its own thing, and I'm appreciating it for what it is instead of what it's not. It's interesting to me how the latest episode is spending a relatively huge amount of screen time in a brothel. But not for the reason you'd think. They are making an effort to contrast what a "brothel" is in Japan vs. what it is in the Western world. But they're doing so in a way which explains things that are happening in the story, albeit in abstract. It's all so beautiful and brilliant...

What I love most is that the series isn't married to simply following Anjin around. I'd argue that he's not even the main character of this series. He really isn't the focus of this episode... he's an accessory. A minor distraction that pops up from time to time. And it's a bold... very bold... tact to take. Ladies of the Willow World is an episode that is very much the calm before the storm, and I'm thrilled that it exists. This is what happens when you take your time and give yourself ten episodes instead of six. Because it makes the big picture so much more rewarding. This is exceptional, not-to-be-missed television.

   
• SO WOKE! I'm going to put this riiiiiight here...

   
• Polska! You guys... YOU GUYS... Netflix has a Polish rom-com streaming! — I swear, in a lot of ways, Polish rom-coms can out-Hallmark Hallmark. This one is called Nic na sile (No Pressure) and it has one of the guys from Uwierz w Mikolaja (I Believe in Santa) in it...

I wish there was a Polish streaming service with American subtitles here. Because I would stream the heck out of that! Good news if you're not into subtitles... Netflix has dubbed it into English if you want.

   
• Harrassment! Can somebody please explain the point of texts like this? I am not a Democrat. I never have been. I always support the best candidate regardless of party...

But if I were a Democrat, I wouldn't be after this harassment. I have texted STOP to this same exact text a dozen times. And each time I block the number. But they just use a different number and text me again and again and again. I have very few regrets in this life. But donating to every Democrat I could find in the 2019 midterms via ActBlue is one of them. I have been relentlessly hounded ever since. There is no way... none... to escape it. They text you no matter how many times you tell them to STOP... they text you no matter how many times you block their numbers. I just looked on my phone. I have 78 blocked numbers. Seventy-eight. To be fair, not all of them are from Democrats. But I bet most of them are. I bet a huge majority are. Because they never, ever stop. So good luck getting another fucking cent out of me via ActBlue. Fuck you and your dataset.

   
• Visibility! Um... before anybody gets their fucking panties in a bunch and start screaming "PICK ANOTHER DAY FOR TRANS VISIBILITY DAY... EASTER IS TAKEN!" You should know that Easter is on a different day each year, but Trans Visibility Day has been on March 31st since it was created in 2009. I swear, nobody loves to be persecuted more than Christians. They are constantly finding ways for their faith to be assaulted... even if it's not even happening. But anyway, happy International Transgender Day of Visibility! Especially to my trans friends who deserve to be seen when society is working overtime to try to erase them just for existing and being themselves.

   
On with your Sunday then...

My cats are frustrated with me because I'm on a mission this three-day-weekend to clean and organize as much as I can. They are much happier when there's no shuffling about and definitely no vacuum, but they get that most weekdays, so I'm trying not to feel bad about it.

My cats, by and large, have been uninterested in my computer. Sure if there's a video they find interesting, they will take a look, but most of the time they couldn't care less what's happening on the display. Except this past week when I was editing some text and Jake was inexplicably fascinated with the words that were appearing before him. He sat and stared at my laptop for quite a while...

I still have no idea what it was all about. If I had to guess, he's faking interest in my work because he's still a little clingy after my return from being gone four days over last weekend...

When he's not acting like he has a headache, that is...

As for Jenny? She's been playing it cool since I returned home. She's not been clingy at all... until bedtime, as usual. She has started making a home in my recycle pile from time to time though...

Which means that now I can't bring myself to take out the recycling, of course.

In non-cat news... my Instagram page has been taken over by... BATS! And I really couldn't be happier about that. They aren't as adorable as cats, but they come darn close. Especially when they're in photos like this...

Could Baturday be in my future? Probably not. I love bats, but really don't want them in my house.

I have a very large denim collection. Partly out of necessity, because my weight fluctuates radically depending on what diet I'm having to be on.

Sometimes I have to eat low-carb in order to regulate blood sugars, and that results in rapid weight loss. When that happens, I'm in a 32-inch waist. When I'm on my regular diet, I'm a 33-inch waist. If I am having mobility issues due to my joints being screwed up long enough, then I'm a 34-inch waist. And... for those rare times I've been on a medication that's escalated weight gain and affected my mobility, I have a three pair of 36-inch waist jeans in a bottom drawer. No idea why I don't have any 35-inch.

So I have jeans with 32, 33, 34, and 36 inch waists.

But it doesn't end there. For each size I have multiple styles.

For the longest time I wore "relaxed" fit jeans because I'm skinny and I thought they made me look not-so-skinny. And it happened to be the style of the day, so Levi's 550's were my go-to.

Then the wider leg jeans went out of style, so I switched back to the straight-leg jeans of my youth, Levi's 501's and 505's.

Then I was traveling and lost my suitcase. I stopped at a store to get some new jeans and shirts and the clerk helping me put me in a tapered leg (Levi's 502's) and slim fit models (Levi's 511's and 513's) because they were popular and she thought the fit was better on me. I never in my life thought I'd buy these kind of jeans, but I ended up loving them. I didn't ever drop down to "skinny jeans" (not at my age!), but I've been wearing slim-fit jeans for over a decade.

But now slim-fit jeans are lumped in with "skinny jeans" and they are very much NOT in style.

And so...

All my slim-fit jeans are going into storage. And my straight-leg jeans are coming out of storage. I have loads of them in good shape with a 33 & 32-inch waist, which is perfect (unless I ended up gaining weight). It doesn't matter that some of them are twenty years old, they're back in style now, so I'm really happy I held onto them.

And this is the reason why I'm holding onto all my slim-fit jeans. In another ten years, who knows? Maybe they'll be back in style and I won't be too old to wear them.

I should donate all my relaxed-fit jeans. I don't picture me ever being able to wear those again. Old guys in baggy jeans doesn't really work in any era.

It always amazes me how people think that the entirety of a country wholeheartedly believes in their government and supports them in everything they do.

And it's like... do YOU wholeheartedly believe in YOUR government and support THEM in everything THEY do?

No?

So why should it be any different in other countries?

I've never found this to be true in any place on this earth I've visited. Yes, some countries have a government that better represents the majority of the people they serve, but even then there will be those who don't agree with what's being done in their name. But here's the thing... no matter where I've been, I've always been able to find a way to relate to my fellow earthlings, at least in general.

I have been warmly invited into the home of a man who hates America. Literally. Would not cry a single tear if the country would implode after the way our government meddled in the affairs of his country. And I'm not imagining things here. He actually said it to me with a smile on his face. But he doesn't hate Americans. At all. Just our government (for which I think he pities us)... and, to be fair, he has justification for it.

But, once invited into his home, the politics of our countries never came up. We talked about our lives, our work, our families, where we live, and a dozen other topics that resulted in smiling faces and laughter. Because, at the bottom of it all, we are both human.

Too many people in too many countries are losing sight of this very basic fact, and it doesn't bode well for humanity. There is history which makes relations between some peoples difficult... very difficult, even... but it's never impossible.

Person to person, anyways.

I drank tea and had a great chat with a guy who despises my country with fervor. I guess miracles can happen. When governments are left at the door.

Facebook memes are often more amusing to me than they probably should be. What can I say? I'm easily amused.

I especially like those memes asking you to score yourself on all the debauchery, danger, and mishaps you've had in life. Partly because people assume that I'm some kind of choirboy or something, but that's never been the case. Not necessarily because I seek these things out... but because they somehow find me.

The latest I ran across asks you to score a point for each thing you haven't done...

I end up with a whopping total of... two points.

1. Skipped school. I skipped school more times than I can count. And it wasn't because I was "hanging out with the wrong crowd" or whatever... it was because school was so boring to me. So some days I just wouldn't go. Which was easy because both my parents worked. And because I got pretty good grades nobody really found out or cared.
2. Broken a bone. Never have. I did saw into my thumb bone with a hacksaw though. And because I had frostbite when I was a kid, I couldn't feel pain. I only knew what happened when I saw the hacksaw blade covered in blood. Oops.
3. Fired a gun. I was raised in Redneckistan and got my NRA Gun Safety training and everything. Haven't touched a gun since 1986 though, because I decided to try and live my life more in accordance with Buddhist precepts, and it's forbidden in the traditions of the Buddhism I follow.
4. Done drugs. Marijuana is legal in Washington State. As to whether I did drugs before that? No comment.
5. Been in a limo. Several times. My sister is fond of hiring them when a group of us is going out... and I was in them often with my work.
6. Gotten a tattoo. I have nine now. Want more. Will probably get more.
7. Ridden a horse. I've ridden horses, camels, and elephants at one time or another.
8. Sung karaoke. I used to work in Japan. It's a very common group activity there. I'm terrible at it, however. And then there was the serious karaoke accident I had in Stockholm where I fell off the back of the stage and cut my chin open.
9. Gotten a ticket. Four speeding tickets. AND I DESERVED NONE OF THEM!!
10. Been arrested. I've been detained, but not arrested. And it was over something that had nothing to do with me, I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Seriously thought I was going to be arrested based on how I was treated though. Guilty until proven innocent, and all that.
11. Gone zip-lining. I've been a few times. It can be fun, depending on the location. I think my favorite is the one down Vegas Old Town under that lighted canopy they have.
12. Been on TV. I've been interviewed a couple times to comment on a project the charity I worked with was involved in.
13. Been on a cruise. My mom loved them. So I've been on a half-dozen.
14. Gotten a piercing. Had my ear pierced in college for years. One day it fell out and got lost, so I left it out.
15. Smoked. I smoked because I was in a crowd that smoked. But after six months or so, I just couldn't do it any more because I felt sick more than anything else.
16. Met a celeb. I've met many. Several band members from bands I like. A lot of TV and movie celebrities at conventions. Occasional random encounters from when I was working in L.A. But it's not like we ever hung out or went shopping or anything.
17. Been skydiving. I went tandem skydiving with a friend. I liked it, so I went back for lessons. Got my certificate after my graduation dive and never felt the need to jump out of an airplane again.
18. Had a one-night stand. And each time I had a one-night stand, there ended up being a pretty good story attached to it. Except once. Which was one of my very few regrets in life. I was a tool for revenge and didn't even know it. Had no way of knowing it. Even so, I still feel like crap because of it.
19. Skinny-dipped. In the Ocean off Maui at night.
20. Been drunk. BWAH HA HA HA HAAAA!

The collapse of the Francis Scott Key Bridge over Baltimore Harbor is yet another tragedy that happened at a place that I've been multiple times. And I have the same weird feeling in my stomach that I get every time. I've flown into BWI (Baltimore/Washington International) quite a few times, and I'd cross the bridge whenever I was avoiding driving through Baltimore by taking the scenic route North to Wilmington, Philadelphia, or New York.

The photos of the collapse ended up being a lot more devastating than I had first thought. I figured it was only a section of the bridge... but nope. It's the bridge. The only thing left are the ramps up to it on both sides. And, as of this writing, there are still six workers missing...

I cannot imagine what this will do to the lives of people who live on one side but work on the other. A five to ten minute hop across the bridge will likely increase to at least 40 minutes going around during rush hours. Interesting to note that people are posting videos of drivers actively driving around the barricades which have been set up in order to try and cross a bridge that's no longer there. It's insanity...

And speaking of insanity...

Notorious insurrectionist and twice-impeached ex-president Donald J. Trump's latest grift is selling Bibles and (presumably) advocating for a Christo-Fascist State, despite the fact he is easily one of the most un-Christian people on earth...

What a load of horse shit.

He says unironically that we have to bring back the Christian religion into this country. But what does that actually mean? How far does he think that should go? Does he plan to revoke The First Amendment? Is it his goal that attending Christian church be mandatory for all American citizens? And that the Christian Bible should be taught in schools? Will proof of being a Christian be required to even BE an American citizen? It's the height of irony that this $60 Bible he's pushing has The Declaration of Independence, U.S. Constitution, and The Bill of Rights in it considering he has made it very clear that he wants to gut all of them.

He says the Bible is his "favorite book?" I'd love to see him talk about any of it in depth, because the idea that he has studied the Bible at all... let alone applies Scripture to his daily life... is laughable. He can't even get through The Ten Commandments! Because with the exception of not killing anybody (that we know of... and even that's debatable because he's definitely killed people indirectly by his actions) and not dishonoring his parents (that we know of, but I'll give him that one too), it would seem he's broken the remaining eight handily. Some of them multiple times. Including #1: Thou shalt have no other gods before me, because clearly the only god he believes in and the only god he serves is money.

These times we live in. Jesus Christ.

My birthday weekend with family was really nice. Riiiight up until today when I had to drive back over the mountains and The Real World.

One of the things we did was go bowling. Something I haven't done in decades. I used to love it (it's how I met my best friends in college), but as my body started falling apart, it seemed like less and less of a good idea. And though I completely sucked at it (being woefully out of practice and trying not to be too physical lest I throw my back out) I had a great time...

And now that I'm home, I want to sleep.

Except I need to clean up my house since I didn't do it before I left.

Always a mistake, but I'm too old to do the smart thing now.

Don't worry, I don't take a day off for my birthday, so it's business as usual up in here... because an all new Bullet Sunday starts... now...

   
• NEWSFLASH: Apple co-founder calls out 'hypocrisy' of politicians calling for TikTok ban — I am really glad that more and more people are speaking up on this bullshit. Especially when they are as respected as Steve Wozniak. As I have said over and over and over... why is TikTok being singled out and punished for something ALL American social media companies and American tech giants (like Google) do? Facebook can take my tracking data and personal viewing habits and sell them to Chinese companies... and that's okay... but a Chinese company monitoring my viewing habits and location directly is not? American social media companies can promote their interests to their users EVEN WHEN IT PROMOTES CHINESE INTERESTS, but Chinese companies can't do this themselves? By all means, continue to monitor how our information is being collected, distributed, and sold. We should definitely be tightening up on that and forcing companies to keep their users informed. I 100% support that. But when it comes to banning companies who collect our data? Either you ban it for ALL or you ban it for NONE. Period.

   
• NEWSFLASH: Delta pilot shitfaced on Jaegermeister jailed for 10 months — Oh come on. Who among us HASN'T attempted to fly a plane while shitfaced on Jäegermeister? Oh. Only me and this guy? Never mind.

   
• MAKE MINE REPAIRABLE! My dryer stopped working this past week. I have absolutely no money for repairs or replacement. But three hours and much Googling got me on track to fixing it myself. Thankfully. These old school dryers with physical switches and knobs are a godsend to self repair. I could have never got through this if I had one of those modern touch screen models where you have no choice but to replace the whole board (which is often more expensive than buying a new machine). And this is exactly why manufacturers use them now, of course. If your appliances have to be replaced every six years, they make more money. — I am thankful every day that my friend told me I was stupid if I got rid of the original Speed Queen appliances that came with my home when I bought it (these were made before Speed Queen had to go on the cheap and started making models that weren't as good). I would have almost certainly had to either replace or pay absurd amounts of money to repair my washer and dryer if I had replaced them with "modern" appliances.

   
• Quiet! I watched the new documentary, Quiet on Set about all the horrific shit that went on at Nickelodeon during its heyday, and I am both mortified and not the least bit surprised. It just goes to show that exploiting and endangering kids for entertainment is still going strong...

But here's the thing that really gets me. The primary guy the documentary focuses on, Dan Schneider, offers up a half-hearted defense with "Multiple network executives approved the content and look of his shows and that dozens of adults were on set and never raised concerns." And it's like... YEAH! THAT'S NOT AN EXCUSE! IT JUST MEANS THAT ALL OF YOU FAILED THESE KIDS!! How is that not fucking glaringly obvious? There's a lot of responses being bounced around, but the only one I care about is what Cory Feldman has to say, because that guy has been sounding the alarm for decades...

People independent of the studio need to be on-set to look ou for child actors. Period. Because studios only give a shit about money. Period. And they don't care what they have to do and who they have to exploit to get it. Period. Just look at the guy Corey is talking about... Brian Peck. After he was fired from Nickelodeon and served prison time for sexual abuse of a minor, HE WAS SUBSEQUENTLY HIRED BY DISNEY! Good Lord. It's unreal how children in the entertainment industry aren't looked out for by somebody.

   
• Babe Bullshit! To this day I wonder whether or not Vani “Food Babe” Hari is just a straight-up liar... or if she's a self-delusional ignoramus who has absolutely NO idea what the fuck she’s talking about. Because the amount of misinformation she throws out is mind-boggling. And people somehow believe her crap...

In a day and age where we should be questioning where we get our information, not enough people are challenging these dipshits in the world who are making a buck off of people's ignorance. That's how we get crap like "The earth is flat!" and "MSG give you cancer!" or whatever. But fortunately there's a growing number of educated people like "Food Science Babe" stepping up to do the job. The problem is that not enough people are listening.

   
• Pizza! This is not safe for work. But it's funny enough that I am compelled to share it...

That must be some amazing pizza.

   
Hope you're celebrating my birthday as hard as I am!