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SuperGrow

Posted on Tuesday, September 1st, 2009

Dave!I'm not here today because I was at Cissa's blog yesterday.

Or something like that.

Bad Monkey's SuperGrow Potting Soil

   

This is one of those rare cases where I'm actually LOL-ing at my own cartoons, so it might be worth a look if you're into that kind of thing. You can also wish Cissa a belated "Happy Birthday" while you're at it.

UPDATE: I've put a copy in an extended entry in case they should ever go missing...

→ Click here to continue reading this entry...
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Preferences

Posted on Wednesday, September 2nd, 2009

Dave!Oh happy day!

I just noticed that Apple has finally... FINALLY... added a Finder preference so that your searches aren't brain dead. In previous Mac OS X versions, the Finder would always search the entire frackin' computer whenever you did a search from a Finder window. This is sublimely stupid, because odds are you just want to search within the folder you are already in! It's about time they fixed this, I just think it's a shame that it's not turned on by default.

Finder Preferences Window Snapshot

This has been such a major frustration for me day-in and day-out that discovering Apple had fixed it was enough to have me walking on air all day! It's the little things, I guess.

   

Viva

Posted on Thursday, September 3rd, 2009

Dave!It will be a weekend to remember.

Or possibly to forget, depending on how much I have to drink.

   

Welcome to Fabulous Las Daveas Sign

   

   

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Categories: Travel 2009Click To It: Permalink  14 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Vegas Weekend Day 1

Posted on Friday, September 4th, 2009

Dave!And so here I am in Sin City. I've been a lot of bizarre and strange places, but all of it pretty much pales in comparison to the bizarre and strange stuff you see in Las Vegas. Limos with hot tubs in the back... people puking on the street... half-naked partiers on the sidewalk... gamblers sobbing inconsolably... drunks EVERYWHERE... it goes on and on. Some might say this parade of non-stop debauchery is the ultimate expression of humanity's downfall. I just think it adds to Las Vegas's already considerable charm.

My day began very, very early as I drove to the airport at 4:00am for my 6:00am plane ride. From there I had three quick back-to-back flights which deposited me in Vegas around 11:00am. I packed light to avoid Horizon Airline's STUPID FUCKING $15 LUGGAGE FEE, which allowed me to skip baggage claim and head directly to my hotel.

After checking in, I played the slots for 15 minutes before winnings $200. Yay me! This money got pocketed, leaving me $62 of my original $100 daily gambling budget (which I would eventually lose, netting me out at +$100 for the day).

I'm guessing that was all the luck I'm gonna get this trip. But you never know.

I cashed out my winnings and headed out to have some drinks with a good friend and his wife whom I haven't seen in nearly seven years. That's when the magic began, as we headed out into the wilds of The Vegas Strip. We started out at The Excalibur where I decided to go out and people-watch while my friends played the tables...

Excalibur Hotel Vegas at Night

In wandering around the South end for a while, I came to the inescapable conclusion that a lot of people... a lot of people... come to Vegas to fight. Every 50-feet I ran into people yelling about something. One drunk woman was causing a major scene as she screamed for her boyfriend/husband to "GIVE ME SOME MONEY!!" over and over and over again. Next I'd see two people yelling over who's turn it was to buy cigarettes. More than a couple of times I overheard people fighting over where they wanted to go next. A particularly nasty brawl erupted in front of the MGM Grand Casino because, from what I could gather, one guy slept with his friend's girlfriend and was freaking out because the guy who got cheated on was threatening to tell the guy's mother on him. This might have been funny, except I'm guessing the guys were in their late 30's or early 40's.

In an attempt to get caught up on the USA Hard Rock properties I haven't visited yet, I dropped by the new cafe on The Strip (leaving only the new Hotel & Casino in Tulsa, Oklahoma remaining)...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

After joining back up with my friends and losing $50 at blackjack, the three of us decided to eat a late dinner at the original Hard Rock Cafe Las Vegas, located in front of the Hard Rock Hotel...

Hard Rock Cafe Vegas Guitar

The hotel's casino is where I decided to blow my last $12 in nickel slots before we started doing Jäger shots at the bar. Oddly enough, it took well over an hour to lose my remaining money... even at MAX BET. They really know how to drag things out in Vegas... but it doesn't really matter, because the house always seems to win in the end. At least they're patient about it.

My friends were staying at Paris Las Vegas, so we decided to take the shuttle back to the MGM Grand and walk back to their hotel. I didn't have any gambling money left, but my $100 in winnings was quickly consumed in alcohol-related expenses along the way...

Paris Las Vegas Eiffel Tower

After saying goodnight to my friends around midnight, I walked north along The Strip to catch The Deuce Bus back to my hotel, when I saw something interesting at the Flamingo...

Donny and Marie Play with Pole Dancers

Yes, that's right... it's Mr. Morality Himself, Donny Osmond. I find it oddly satisfying that this self-righteous ass is more than happy to tell people how to live their lives according to his beliefs with his lobbying against gay marriage... and yet here he is, right next to his twice-divorced sister advertising at a venue where pole dancers are shaking their ass to beckon people inside the casino to smoke, drink, and gamble (all three of which I'd imagine are also against his beliefs). I guess Donny's moral superiority can be yours... IF the price is right.

But I'd imagine that would hold true for a lot of people in Las Vegas.

Me included!*

   

*My morals can be rented for very favorable hourly rates. Long-term leases also welcome!

   

If you're not afraid of bugs, there's more to today's post in an extended entry...

→ Click here to continue reading this entry...

   

Vegas Weekend Day 2

Posted on Saturday, September 5th, 2009

Dave!Today was filled with surprises, and all in a good way... for once.

I started out kind of early, because I wanted to head back down the strip and see my friends off before they left to the airport. As we were wrapping things up, they asked me if I was going to the Grand Opening of the Hard Rock Cafe, Las Vegas Strip Edition. I had read that the opening was being postponed, again, so this kind of caught me off guard. So after everybody was bundled up in a taxi, I walked down The Strip and confirmed that the new property was indeed opening up this morning at 11:00.

Score!

After waiting around for 35 minutes, I was the first one "officially" up the escalator to the new venue where I found...

Disappointment.

This is an absolutely beautiful restaurant. Unfortunately, it's a pretty shitty Hard Rock Cafe. And let me tell you why... it's the memorabilia. Or lack of memorabilia, to be more accurate.

From the very moment that Eric Clapton hung his guitar on the wall of the original Hard Rock in London, rock memorabilia has been an integral part of the Hard Rock "experience" for its visitors. When you walk through those doors and see the expanse of one-of-a-kind items, it's like a rock-n-roll museum you'd find in your dreams. For music-lovers, its perfect.

But not here. Not this time.

The memorabilia is so anemic that the place barely feels like a "Hard Rock" at all. It's sad, actually. As an example, here's the bar area. How much memorabilia do you see?

Las Vegas Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

Uhhh... yeah... there's a few mannequins in the background. And what about here in the main dining room...

Las Vegas Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

What is that... like SEVEN whole pieces and two televisions? Compare that to but one small corner of the Hard Rock Cafe in Biloxi's hotel and casino property...

Hrc Biloxi2

Or Lisbon, Portugal...

Hard Rock Cafe Lisbon

Or Foxwoods, Connecticut...

Foxwoods

Or Memphis, Tennessee...

HRC Memphis

Or even the cafe they just closed in Salt Lake City...

Hard Rock Salt Lake

... Just to name a few. Now those... those are Hard Rock Cafes!! The memorabilia is so thick you're swimming in it. You have to visit again and again just to see it all. THAT'S WHAT A HARD ROCK CAFE IS ALL ABOUT!!

But this new cafe on The Vegas Strip? Almost nothing. In fact, there are entire sections of the restaurant which are practically devoted to nothing. Here's the upstairs bar...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

And the mini "Hard Rock Live" stage...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

And some kind of small VIP room also upstairs...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip

Occasional random pieces hidden away, but really nothing. NOTHING!! This is supposed to be a Hard Rock?!? The only thing that keeps the place from being a total failure is the staff, which is terrific. And also the sweet "Microsoft Surface" touch tables they've got scattered around the joint (like the one behind the curtain above). You sit down, and it's like a giant iPhone on steroids with its awesome multi-touch interface. Here I am looking at pins from various cafes...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip: Microsoft Surface

You can toss them around, rotate them, move them in and out, stack them... or even pinch and pull them to zoom in for a much, much closer look...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip: Microsoft Surface

Other toys include a memorabilia viewer for cafes around the globe which you pick out from an actual spinning globe. This is cool, because it's not like this cafe has much memorabilia to look at here...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip: Microsoft Surface

They even have distractions like puzzles, videos, and even a piano...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip: Microsoft Surface

Alas, it's by Microsoft, so you have to brace yourself for all the crashes and failures...

Hard Rock Cafe on The Vegas Strip: Microsoft Surface

Knowing what this cafe COULD HAVE BEEN almost makes me cry. All that wonderful space that COULD have been crammed with awesome memorabilia from the Hard Rock's extensive collection... wasted. I have no idea who is designing this shit, but somebody needs to stop them. Take the Hard Rock back to what it is at its core. Take it back to what makes it special. Take it back to what people want to see. Take it back to what makes me want to travel the globe and see them all. Take. It. Back.

Sigh.

After goofing around at the Hard Rock for a bit, I headed back to the hotel to meet up with the Official TequilaCon 2010 Planning Committee... Jenny, Vahid, and Brandon. The day kind of went like this...

Drinks. Accusations. Threats. Apologies. Sunglasses. Cigarette holders. News. Drinks. Slots. Slots. Drinks. Craps. Slots. Video Poker. Drinks. Drinks. Drinks. Drinks. Drinks. Slots. Dinner. OFFICIAL TEQUILACON BUSINESS...

TequilaCon Map

Then Walking. Goodnight Brandon. Slots. Drinks. Video Poker. Slots. Walgreens. And lastly, the Fremont Street Experience...

Fremont Street Experience!

Fremont Street Experience!

And there you have it. Just another boring day in Las Vegas, Nevada.

   
UPDATE: I had a long email conversation with somebody who basically asked "who are you to define what is or isn't a Hard Rock?" Which I thought was odd, because they're pretty much self-defining (as the photos I posted above will attest). But even setting that aside, just look at a description of the HRC Hurghada from the Hard Rock Cafe's own web site...

The cafe, while reflecting the charm and flavor of the local architecture, is still a Hard Rock through and through offering an extensive collection of incredible rock memorabilia...

So, even at the Hard Rock Cafe corporate offices, the abundance of memorabilia is looked upon as a defining trait of a good cafe. If I'm seen as "defining" a cafe, I'm only doing so from the definition provided by the organization themselves.

   

Bullet Sunday 148

Posted on Sunday, September 6th, 2009

Dave!Tonight it's a very special Las Vegas edition of Bullet Sunday!

It's special since there's only one bullet. And that's because it's such an incredibly awesome bullet that you would totally forget any other bullets that might appear afterwards.

• ELVIS! The Official Planning Meeting for TequilaCon 2010 ended with a bang when the entire committee decided to attend the Legends show at Harrah's. The acts performing tonight were Britney Spears, James Brown, David Bowie, The Temptations, and (of course) ELVIS!

Here's photos of Jenny collecting an autograph (and some sweat off of Elvis's chest!)...

Jenny and Elvis

Jenny and Elvis

Jenny and Elvis

Jenny and Elvis

Such shameless flirting! I think she's totally found herself a new boyfriend.

And here's a crummy picture I took of our photo with my pocket camera...

TequilaCon 2010 Planning Committee with Elvis

IMPORTANT NOTE: Just to be clear, that is the cuff of Brandon's shirt... NOT Elvis's penis popping out of his pants. Such genius that you'd almost swear that Brandon planned it that way. Which he probably did.

Elivis signed it "To TequilaCon Forever"...

Elvis Autograph

And thus ends what is probably the most perfect Bullet Sunday in the history of Bullet Sunday.

   

Upgrades

Posted on Monday, September 7th, 2009

Dave!Over the next couple days I'm having my blog templates upgraded, so there may be some problems pop up while things get sorted out. I was going to do a redesign at the same time, but I kind of like my blog the way it is.

Blog Broked

   

A couple people asked me "how I did" in Vegas. Since I made it home alive, I'd say I did okay, but I don't think that's what they are talking about... they want to know how much money I won or lost. The truth is that I am not much of a gambler, even though I seem to be luckier than average.

Which is to say that I lose less money than average, because at the end of the day, the casino almost always ends up the winner. Given the addictive nature of gambling, it helps to have a plan. To make sure I don't go broke, I set myself a daily budget based on the total amount of loose change I've managed to collect over the last year or so... $264. This spread out to $64 for the first half-day, and $100 for Saturday and Sunday. My luck played out something like this...

  • Accidentally won on slots when I was using the machine to break a fifty dollar bill. I wasn't even paying attention to what was happening because I was Twittering. When the bell went off I thought I had won the $120,000 shown the "progressive pot" display because the bell didn't stop. An attendant came up and did something to the machine, then congratulated my on my $200 win. Which would be great if I weren't expecting $120,000. Who knew winning $200 could be so depressing? The win cost me a whole $6, and I decided to call it a day... SCORE! WIN/LOSS AS OF FRIDAY: Up $194
  • Usually I keep my winnings entirely separate so I don't blow it all after my budget is gone. But Jenny and I wanted to learn how to play craps, which was a $100 educational loss (does this mean I can write it off on my taxes?). Still, I did pretty good on the slots and managed to win $33 by the end of the day. WIN/LOSS AS OF SATURDAY: Up $127
  • Not content to let my new-found skills go to waste, I blew through my $100 budget in an hour at the craps table (if only I had stopped when I was up $80!). Since this brutal blow to my ego happened first-thing in the morning, the rest of the day would have been pretty boring if I stopped gambling... so I rolled my $127 into big fun on the Vegas Strip. And ended up losing all of it... along with an additional $81. So much for following my own rules. WIN/LOSS AS OF SUNDAY: Down $181

So I lost $181. Which isn't bad when you consider it gave me three days' worth of entertainment AND was under my budgeted amount of $264. This would be great if I hadn't burned through the remaining $83 at the new Hard Rock Cafe an The Vegas Strip buying Grand Opening collector's pins. Oh well.

And now I'm home again... collecting my pocket change for the next time.

   

Losing

Posted on Tuesday, September 8th, 2009

Dave!Oh hai!

Work on my blog templates continues. If you notice any issues, please leave a comment. If you can't leave a comment, please send me an email (my address is in the sidebar of every page) so I can try and get it fixed. Thanks!

This morning I was awakened by leg cramps from being too cold. Something happened to the weather while I was gone, forcing me to break out some blankets for my bed at 2:00am. I guess this means summer is over, and I'm kind of sad about that. All I can think about is all the things I wanted to do that never happened this year. Now there's no time left... the days are flying by, and it's going to be 2010 before we know it.

I'd make plans to put everything off until then, but that strategy didn't work out too well when I tried it in 2008.

Apparently, I'm in a losing battle with time...

Dave Bang Your Head

But, then again, I guess that's a battle nobody ever really wins.

Except zombies, of course...

DAVETOON: Walking Zombies

If there's a benefit to being undead, that would be it.

Well, that and all those delicious brains you get to eat

   

Nines

Posted on Wednesday, September 9th, 2009

Dave!It's 9-9-09 and a lot of things seemed to happen today. The two most significant, at least to me, were the release of the remastered Beatles albums on CD and Apple's release of iTunes 9 and its accompanying iPhone update.

"Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except Me and My Monkey"

I'm a big Beatles fan. And when the rumor went out that their albums were going to be remastered, I was thrilled. Mostly because I assumed they'd finally be made available for purchase on iTunes. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. It's going to happen eventually (at least according to Yoko Ono), just not today.

That being said, I wish I had a couple hundred dollars burning a hole in my pocket so I could pick up the Beatles Mono Gift Box Set...

The Beatles Mono Gift Box Set

The first albums were recorded in mono and designed to be heard that way. Having listened to many of the original LP records, they definitely seem to have a brighter, crisper sound than the murky stereo mixes they put on CD. But, alas, I just paid to have my blog templates updated, so the money isn't available. Hopefully when the songs make it to iTunes, you'll be able to buy the mono versions there.

"Happiness Is a Warm Gun"

I'm a big Apple Computer fan. They rarely fuck up and, compared to the heinous shit that Microsoft releases, Apple is a dream come true. But when Apple does fuck up... they REALLY fuck up spectacularly. As an example: the steaming pile of shit known as MobileMe which is not just bad... it's Microsoft bad. The fact that they haven't fixed MobileMe is embarrassing on any number of levels, especially considering that they continue to charge $99 a year for the service.

But today Apple totally outdid themselves.

The new iTunes 9 and iPhone update are beyond Microsoft bad.

I'd feel embarrassed for Apple, but I'm just too angry. After wasting loads of my time, losing my data, and turning my phone into a brick... well... let's just say Windows Vista now has some company as MY MOST HATED SOFTWARE EVER! If you care to read all about my woes, I've put a profanity-laden rant in an extended entry...

→ Click here to continue reading this entry...

   

Hubble

Posted on Thursday, September 10th, 2009

Dave!My morning routine is a rather complex series of events which is based on a number of "What-If" scenarios. Such as if I wake up and can't move because my joints are messed up, I then have to take pills so I can function properly. But these pills can trigger an idiopathic angioedema swelling attack... usually in dangerous or uncomfortable places.

Like the bottoms of my feet, which ballooned up with painful welts that made walking and driving a difficult and agonizing experience this morning. A massive dose of antihistamines helps some, but it still takes a serious chunk of time for the swelling to subside. In the meanwhile, I am having to hobble around in pain all day long. Not a fun time.

As of 10:00pm tonight, my feet are still in pretty bad shape, so I am taking some serious drugs which will probably have me passing out any minute now.

I'll see how far I can get...

I received a rather interesting comment about my rant yesterday from somebody accusing me of being "anti-Apple" (oh the sweet, sweet irony). I would have gladly published it... except they used a couple of slurs which I refuse to publish on my blog. The gist of the comment was that my "tirade" against MobileMe was unjustified, and I "obviously haven't been using it lately, because it performs flawlessly." This is laughable for a number of reasons, one of which being that I use MobileMe several times a day to sync information between my various Macs (when it feels like syncing anyway). But mostly it's bullshit because iDisk is a complete and total piece of crap which has NEVER worked. Here's an example...

Today I bought a couple new iTunes songs on my work computer. I wanted to transfer them to my laptop when I got home, so I thought I'd drag them into my iDisk where they'd be waiting for me. Except dropping the first music file in my iDisk immediately made The Finder drop to its knees and become unresponsive. After ten minutes, I decided to give up and restart the Finder. Except this is what I got halfway through the process...

The Finder Can't Be Opened!

Game over. MobileMe's iDisk was able to crash the Mac's Finder file system so thoroughly that it couldn't even be restarted. A complete reboot of the entire computer was required. And this is not an isolated incident. This is an easily reproduced problem that happens ALL THE TIME for no apparent reason. So I am not talking out of my ass here. When I say MobileMe is a flaming pile of shit, it comes from experience.

And, in happier news, have you seen the latest images to come from the Hubble Telescope after it was updated and refurbished? Holy cats, it's beautiful stuff...

New Hubble Image!

New Hubble Image!

New Hubble Image!

New Hubble Image!

I could literally stare at stuff like this all day long. Thank you NASA for using some of my tax dollars in a way I whole-heartedly approve of. I look forward to many, many more incredible images from Hubble.

And now the drugs are starting to kick in, which means I should probably stop blogging before I hurt myself.

   

Tourism

Posted on Friday, September 11th, 2009

Dave!

World Trade Center from Empire State Building

On top of the World Trade Center

View from the Top of The World

Looking up at the Statue of Liberty

World Trade Center from the Statue of Liberty

   

   

Cooper

Posted on Saturday, September 12th, 2009

Dave!Many years ago I rescued a plant that somebody had thrown in the garbage at work. He was kind of an odd thing, because he had been planted in a hole that had been drilled in a piece of lava rock. He was also pretty sickly-looking with only three yellow-ish leaves stuck to a crooked twig.

But I felt sorry for him sitting all alone in the trash, and figured that any plant that could survive living on a rock deserved a shot. So I rescued him, then started nursing him back to health with plant vitamins. I also bought some wire and sticks in an attempt to straighten out his stem. After a couple of years of tender loving care, he actually ended up looking pretty good. I named him Cooper, and he's sat on top of my filing cabinet ever since.

Over the years Cooper has had to put up with some pretty heinous treatment.

I've gone on trips and forgotten to water him. I've knocked him off the filing cabinet. He even had to suffer through the Winter of 1997 when somebody turned the heat up to 90-degrees in an attempt to melt the snow off the roof. But Cooper is a survivor, and always manages to pull through.

Yesterday he had his worst day since being tossed in the garbage.

I went to the water cooler to get a glass of water and ended up grabbing a handful of Cheez-Its along the way. When I got back to my office, I remembered that I'm going on vacation for a week, so I thought I'd share my water with Cooper so he'd be okay while I was gone.

As I was packing up to go home, I noticed something odd...

Cheez-It Planter

Poor Cooper.

Apparently I ended up drinking the water and dropping my remaining Cheez-Its into his bowl instead. And while I would never question the fantastic nutritional value of Cheez-Its for humans... something tells me that they don't have the same benefits for plants.

Fortunately, I noticed my stupidity and was able to remedy the situation. Cooper is now Cheez-It-free, well-watered, and ready for a week of alone-time.

But what in the heck does this say about my mental state?

I must really, really need this vacation.

   

Day One: Seattle

Posted on Sunday, September 13th, 2009

Dave!Ooh! It's time for vacation!

I'm departing sunny Seattle for the rain-soaked shores of Glacier Bay, Alaska. At least I'm assuming they're rain-soaked shores, because that's what everybody has been telling me. Whenever people hear where I'm going, it seems to be all they can talk about... "Those Alaska cruises are fantastic... if you like rain" or "You'll love it... if you don't mind getting wet" or "Yeah, I did that Alaska cruise... AND I HAVE NEVER SEEN SO MUCH RAIN IN ALL MY LIFE!" Since rain doesn't bother me much, I'm not worried about getting wet. I am, however, a little concerned that it seems to be the most memorable part of the trip for people who have done it before.

Interestingly enough, Seattle had positively flawless weather today...

Sunny Seattle

Sunny Seattle

But the minute we headed out into Puget Sound, the clouds started rolling in...

Aboard Ship

Looking Aft

Which made for a nice sunset...

Ships Passing In The Night

After the sun had gone, mist drifted in and covered the shoreline...

Sun Has Set

Misty Shore

And now it's getting dark. That must mean it's time for ice cream.

   

Day Two: At Sea

Posted on Monday, September 14th, 2009

Dave!Cruises have their pros and cons. The biggest pro is that you get to visit a lot of places without having to pack and un-pack your suitcase. Your "hotel room" travels with you, so all your stuff gets to stay where it is. The biggest con is that any time you're not visiting someplace, you're trapped on a giant boat. For some people, this is paradise... but for somebody like me, it's paramount to torture. And it's all my fault, I'm sure. I don't like doing arts & crafts. I don't like cheesy trivia challenges or BINGO games. I don't like non-stop eating. I don't like socializing with crazy strangers. I don't like going to the spa. And I really don't like "Broadway-style" shows and crappy comedy routines. That leaves walking around on deck and reading books all day. Which is okay... but not the kind of adventure I'm used to having while on vacation.

But it is relaxing because you get to look at stuff like this all day...

Queen Charlotte Island from Sea

Except...

There are a lot of people onboard. And most people are idiots. And many of those idiots are assholes.

Yesterday after I got onboard, I immediately went to the shore excursions desk to confirm my reservations. I was third in line. The couple at the front of the line was finishing up, and gave their room number to the agent for billing. It was on the lowest deck in a not-so-glamorous area of the ship, which caused the guy ahead of me to say "Gee, they sure stuck you in a crappy cabin!"

How do people like this live with themselves?

For all anybody knows, that couple might have saved money for years for this cruise, and that cabin was the best they could afford. Suddenly a vacation they were excited about was crapped on by some moron with poor manners and a big mouth.

Me, being me, was compelled to say to the couple "Hey, at least you can take consolation that you're not on the jerkwad deck!" which was good for a laugh. Sure this makes me no better than the asshole, but what can I say? I live to humiliate mean people.

Because I will never understand those who gain happiness by bringing misery to others.

Which is why I very nearly screamed "SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!" to yet another dumbass who was heckling a musician playing on the pool deck. Here was this guy doing his best to entertain people. and he has to listen to some idiot keep interrupting him by screaming "FREEBIRD! FREEBIRD! FREEBIRD!" and "DO YOU KNOW ANY OTHER SONGS?"

People like to joke that I travel so much because I am a global assassin for hire. If that were true, I would kill this stupid fucker at no charge for the benefit of all society.

Anyway, it wasn't all boring today... there was some excitement too.

First of all, I saw a whale swimming outside the window during dinner. He was beautiful as he arched through the water, and it evoked a lot of "oohs and ahs" in the dining room. I didn't have my camera ready, so I can't show you what he looked like, but I can show you what he didn't look like...

This is not a whale!

At first I found it funny when people would get all excited because they thought they were seeing whales, but were instead seeing a piece of wood or a blob of kelp. But after the tenth time it gets pretty tiring.

The second thing that happened is that we were attacked by pirates...

Pirate Boat!

At least I thought they were pirates. It turns out that it wasn't a boat full of evil pirates after all... it was just a pilot boat making sure we didn't crash into the coastline or something.

But we didn't need pirates. There was already evil on board. AN EVIL TOWEL PIGEON WITH BEADY LITTLE RED EYES!! He was sitting on my bed when I got back from dinner...

Evil Towel Pigeon

But the most exciting thing today was the sunset view from my balcony...

Sunset at Sea

Pretty sweet. Tomorrow the ship arrives in Juneau. That'll be even sweeter.

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Categories: Travel 2009Click To It: Permalink  14 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Day Three: Juneau

Posted on Tuesday, September 15th, 2009

Dave!After disembarking in Juneau, it was time to take a helicopter ride over the Tongass Forest up to the Mendenhall Glacier for a walkabout. Definitely one of the more amazing experiences in my life! It was not at all cold, there was no rain, and visibility was fantastic. I took a couple hundred photos, but am too knackered to go sorting through them tonight. I'll just post a few that caught my eye.

NOTE: I know it may look as though I've done some Photoshop trickery to get that brilliant deep blue color on the glacier... but I didn't. That's all real, exactly as my camera recorded it! If anything, it's less vibrant in the photos, because it's all flattened out.

Flying above the freaky ice formations of the Mendenhall Glacier...

Flying Above the Mendenhall Glacier

Blue Mendenhall Ice Cracks

Glacier Cap

Landing on the glacier...

Helicopter on the Glacier

Trekking around in search of glacier ice...

Mendenhall Rift

Mendenhall Split

Glacial Pool

Above a Rift

Glacier Split

Mendenhall Glacier Flats

The helicopters return to pick us up...

Helicopter Landing

Walking around the nifty State Capitol of Juneau, Alaska...

Downtown Juneau

Returning to the ship at night...

Juneau Harbor at Night

All in all... a pretty darn good day!

   

Day Four: Skagway

Posted on Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

Dave!Today was a very early day arriving in rainy Skagway.

And the reason it was an early start was because I had booked a river rafting trip through the Chilkat Eagle Preserve outside of Haines, Alaska. The rain wasn't entirely unexpected, because this area is smack in the middle of a rainforest. What was unexpected was that the rain decided to let up the entire time our group was on the river, so it actually made for a fantastic (and relatively dry) morning.

There was quite a bit of mist hanging around which looked really cool, but made spotting the eagles a more difficult...

Trees in the Mist

The mist also made it quite challenging to photograph the eagles, but there were 44 of the birds spotted during the trip so I was able to get quite a few good shots. Since I was on a moving raft I forced a high shutter speed on my camera to keep things sharp. This caused the picture quality to suffer, but at least I didn't end up with a bunch of blurry eagles. Once I used Photoshop to zoom in and add some contrast, they look pretty good...

It's an Eagle!

It's an Eagle!

It's an Eagle!

Overall I shot close to 70 pictures of these beautiful creatures, but it's just not the same as seeing them in person.

After an hour floating down the river looking at Eagles, it was time for a picnic lunch and a ferry ride back to Skagway. The scenery along the was was pretty spectacular...

Harding Glacier in Skagway

Skagway Falls

Skagway Harbor

The town itself seems to be one big tourist trap, and I'm told half of the businesses here belong to Princess Cruise Lines, which makes a lot of sense. Still, it's kind of a charming place that maintains ties back to its gold-rush roots with wooden sidewalks and such...

Skagway, Alaska

I'm not much of a shopper, so it was time to walk along the pier so I could beat the crowds and get back to the ship for and early dinner...

Skagway Pier

Tomorrow is a day at sea. Usually I don't like sea days, but I admit it will be nice to be able to sleep in and relax for a while.

   

Day Five: Glacier Bay

Posted on Thursday, September 17th, 2009

Dave!A day in magnificent Glacier Bay.

Mists on Glacier Bay

Mt. Cooper

Sunny Mountains

Sunfall

The Margerie Glacier

Norwegian Peal Glacier Overlook

Blue Glacier

Blue Ice

Island in Glacier Bay

Johns Hopkins Glacier

   

Day Six: Ketchikan

Posted on Friday, September 18th, 2009

Dave!I don't believe in luck.

That being said, I have been incredibly lucky all-around on this trip. Landed in Juneau... POURING RAIN! But then it stops just in time to trek on the Mendenhall Glacier. Arrive in Skagway... POURING RAIN! But then it slows to barely a drizzle when it's time to raft through the Chilkat Eagle Preserve. Floating through Glacier Bay... POURING RAIN AND IMPENETRABLE MIST! But then, just as the ship arrives at the Margerie Glacier, the sun breaks through and we have perfect visibility. And then this morning, dock at Ketchikan... POURING RAIN AND MORE MIST! But then, after a half-hour or so, it pretty much stops.

As I said, unbelievably lucky.

And then there was today's excursion, which was a float-plane flight to Neets Bay to look at bears...

Float-Plane Flight to Neets Bay, Alaska

Misty Alaska

Neets Bay Fish Ladder

And then I got so unfuckingbelievably lucky that I should probably buy lottery tickets immediately.

Because usually on nature sightseeing trips, there are odds that you won't get to see any wildlife at all. I booked the earliest bear-watch tour I could get since I was told the odds were better in the morning, but even that was no guarantee.

But I was lucky, again, because there were bears to be seen. And it was pretty much as I expected. Little bears off in the distance, looking for food...

Momma Bear and Baby Bear

What I didn't expect was to see a bear up close...

River Bear

I certainly didn't anticipate being just 30 feet away either...

Bear in the Bush

And I about shit myself when I saw bears just 15 feet away...

Wet Bear

Bear Says

So you can imagine how I nearly lost all control over my bodily functions when I saw a momma bear and baby bear in a tree just 10 feet overhead...

Momma Bear in a Tree

As I said, unfuckingbelievably lucky. Having a Bald Eagle show up as I was leaving was just icing on the cake...

American Bald Eagle in a Tree

Then the float-plane arrived to take our group back to Ketchikan... where the rain started pouring again...

Float Plane Landing in Neets Bay

Back in Ketchikan

Eagle Statue in front of the Norwegian Pearl Ship

Maybe I should start believing in luck after all.

   

Day Seven: Victoria

Posted on Saturday, September 19th, 2009

Dave!Today's port of call was the beautiful city of Victoria in British Columbia... except the ship didn't arrive until 6:00pm. So while you do technically get a five-hour visit in the city as advertised, it's at night time. This means you can't really go sightseeing, and many of the stores are closed. I have no frickin' clue why NCL even bothers to stop, except it looks good on the itinerary they sell you.

Fortunately, I've already been to Victoria three or four times, so it's not a big deal... except such a short visit at such wacky hours seems kind of pointless. If there wasn't berthing space to let us dock at a decent hour, why not stop in Sitka or some other port where you actually have time to see things in frickin' daylight?

Oh well.

There's a restaurant here in Victoria I have been trying to visit for years. It's a vegetarian place called "Re-Bar Modern Food" that comes highly recommended.

And deservedly so, because the food there was frickin' amazing...

Re-Bar Modern Food Sign

After dinner, there really wasn't much to do but wander around the Inner Harbor. The tourist shops there are gearing up for the 2010 Winter Olympics, and their Quatchi mascot is everywhere...

Quatchi the Sasquatch!

He's cool and all, but personally, I prefer... FIDDLER DARTH VADER!

Darth Vader Fiddles!

It's getting pretty cold out at night, but roses were still in bloom...

Victoria Rose

The world-famous Empress Hotel looks even nicer at night...

Empress Hotel at Night

Victoria Legislative Building in Lights...

Sparkly Lights in Victoria

And that's the end of my cruise.

But not my vacation... at least not quite yet...

   

Bullet Sunday 149

Posted on Sunday, September 20th, 2009

Dave!Last week I skipped Bullet Sunday because I was traveling but, lucky for me, Hilly-Sue was kind enough to pick up my slack! This week the bullets are back in Seattle, and so am I...

• Finale! Now that it's all over, I have to say that the cruise to Alaska was pretty darn special. Despite some dreary weather in spots, things couldn't have gone better, and the shore excursions were all beyond amazing experiences. If you're looking for a little adventure in your life, you could do a lot worse than exploring the Inside Passage. I booked through Jester's new company, Cruise Avenue, and am grateful for all his advice in getting me the perfect vacation. Might want to see those glaciers now while you still can...

   

• Pandemonium! Just got back from the Pet Shop Boys' "Pandemonium" tour stop in Seattle. It seems like it was just yesterday I went to their first-ever concert here in the city, and now they're back for round two! As expected, the show was amazing. I really like their new album, Yes, and they did a good job of mixing the new material with their classic hits...

Pet Shop Boys Pandemonium Tour Poster

For my fellow Pet Shop fans, the set-list went something like this... Heart, Did You See Me Coming?, Pandemonium/Can You Forgive Her?, Love Etc., Integral/Building a Wall, Go West, Two Divided By Zero/Why Don't We Live Together?, Always On My Mind, New York City Boy, Closer to heaven/Left to my Own Devices, Do I Have To?, King's Cross, The Way It Used To Be, Jealousy, Suburbia, All Over The World, Se A Vida É (That's The Way Life Is), Discoteca/Domino Dancing/Viva La Vida (COLDPLAY?!?), It's A Sin, Being Boring (encore), West End Girls (encore). A pretty sweet set... despite the sound at The Moore Theater being really uneven, and the sound-mix for the show being pretty bad in parts (Neil's vocals during King's Cross were obliterated). Still... well worth attending!

   

• Pet Shop Pics! I was too busy enjoying the show to be much of a photographer, but still managed to grab a few shots when I thought of it. From the looks of things, Neil and Chris have taken the "Cubism" theme of their previous tour and amped it up to the n-th degree, appearing as cube-heads with cube-head dancers and backup singers. As always, it was a pretty impressive production... even when restrained to the small stage of The Moore...

Pet Shop Boys with Cube-Heads!

Dancing Buildings on Stage!

Silver Confetti Finale!

   

• Dee-Jay? I have been to clubs where very talented individuals have crafted amazing mixes of a wide variety of music in clever and interesting ways. These DJ's deserve their title, and work hard to craft an exciting experience for their audience. On the OTHER end of the spectrum, you have people who just take a string of dance remixes with the EXACT SAME throbbing disco beat... smash them together one after another... and call themselves a DJ. Now, it's probably me... I'm just somebody who doesn't "get" it... but who the fuck cares? Apparently, the Pet Shop Boys do, because THAT'S who they had as their opening act... a disco DJ with one throbbing beat after another. I honestly couldn't tell where one song starts and the other begins. It's just a blur of bass and synthesizers (but mostly bass). Yeah, I'm sure this "music" is just awesome to somebody who can appreciate it (or is high on crystal meth)... but I thought it sucked copious amounts of ass. After 45 minutes of this redundant shit, I was ready to jump off the balcony. The only thing I can think of to explain it is that the Pet Shop Boys wanted to bore the shit out of people before they take the stage so they appear that much better. Which is crazy. They don't need it. Things don't get much better than the Pet Shop Boys live.

   

• Progress? They keep plugging away at Seattle's Hard Rock Cafe. Now they've got actual signs up to let people know what's coming (but who knows when?)...

Hard Rock Cafe Seattle

   

• Blue! Man, what a beautiful day in Seattle I came back to from rainy Alaska!

City Fish Market Sign in a Blue, Blue Sky!

   

And thus ends my week of vacation big happy fun time. Back to the daily grind...

   

Seasoned

Posted on Monday, September 21st, 2009

Dave!I don't know that anybody cares what television I'm watching, but it comes up from time to time so I thought I might as well get a post out of the way.

It's only fair to preface this list with my disgust and loathing of television in general now-a-days. Too many great shows get cancelled (=ahem= PUSHING DAISIES =ahem=) only to be replaced with complete and total crap (usually reality television dumbassery) and networks never even care about the people watching these shows. If they did, they wouldn't leave viewers hanging, and allow shows to wrap-up stories and plots in a satisfactory manor.

But oh well. Such is the risk of a television junkie.

NEW HOTNESS I AM GIVING A SHOT...

  • COMMUNITY. I admit I was not too impressed with the pilot. But it's starring Joel McHale, who I love more than toast. Hopefully it will find its footing and live up to Joel's potential.
  • FLASHFORWARD. I am very, very unsure they can maintain this story over the course of a season (I'm having flashbacks of "The Nine" here), but I liked the book on which it's been based (of the same name) so I'm game.
  • ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE. I honestly don't give this show much hope, but I'm willing to give it a try because I like Jenna Elfman and really like Ashley Jensen.
  • NCIS: L.A. I positively loathe the original "NCIS" but love Linda Hunt, so I'm giving it a shot. Hopefully the dialogue and acting will be upgraded from the slapsticky crap that plagues the original, and give us a show more like the originator of them both: JAG.
  • MODERN FAMILY. This doesn't seem like it would be my kind of show, but the buzz has me really curious to check it out.
  • COUGAR TOWN. I will probably dump it after one episode, but I am inexplicably curious to see what this show is about. Wish I knew why, because it has FAIL! written all over it.
  • THE CLEVELAND SHOW. Will it be as funny as "Family Guy?" Probably not. But I very much want to find out.
  • V. I cannot fathom how the remake will possibly manage to top the original without the incomparable Jane Badler as "Diana" but, after the raging success of "Battlestar Galactica," we'll see.
  • HUMAN TARGET. A great comic book series with nice potential for a television series. They certainly cast the lead well... here's hoping that Mark Valley manages to work his "Keen Eddie" magic again.

RETURNING HOTNESS I AM WATCHING AGAIN...

  • CASTLE. Probably my favorite returning new show. The premise is great. The chemistry between the leads is electric. The writing is smart and clever. The mysteries well-crafted. It is dipped in WIN!
  • GARY UNMARRIED. One of the few new new shows from last season which actually manages to make me laugh. As if that weren't enough: Paula. Marshall.
  • SCRUBS (retooled). I loved the original show, and am not sure how I feel about them retooling it minus a big chunk of the cast... but I'm willing to give it a shot for old time's sake.

OTHER STUFF I AM NOT QUITE DUMPING YET...

"How I Met Your Mother" - "Big Bang Theory" - "House" - "Grey's Anatomy" - "Survivor: Samoa" - "Parks and Recreation" - "Family Guy" - "American Dad" - "The Simpsons" - "CSI: New York" - "SNL" - "30 Rock" - "Psych" - "Burn Notice" - "Top Chef" - "Project Runway"

   

NEW CRAP I WON'T BOTHER WATCHING...

  • GLEE. I'd rather be kicked in the balls then water-boarded than watch a show built around crappy singers covering popular music.
  • THE FORGOTTEN. This looks like a copy of "Cold Case" with less talented actors. Since I already loathe "Cold Case" why would I watch a re-tread with (shudder) Christian Slater headlining?
  • JAY LENO SHOW. When Leno (the most un-funny comedian on late-night this side of Jimmy Fallon) left "The Tonight Show" I threw a party to celebrate that I wouldn't accidentally land on his show when channel-surfing. When I heard he was getting yet another show to be not funny on, I was depressed for a week.
  • TRAUMA. Oh boy! It's a "new and improved" version of "ER"... NOW WITH EXPLOSIONS! Pass.
  • VAMPIRE DIARIES. Bitch, please. I refuse to read or watch "Twilight" so I'm hardly in a position to give a shit about all the crap that gets made into a TV series because of it.

OLD CRAP I WON'T BOTHER WATCHING...

  • DOLLHOUSE. I don't care if it is Whedon... this was the most pathetically bad show from last year. Let's take a blisteringly hot babe (Eliza Dushku!) and implant her with the most boring characters possible. Week after week after week after week. Add in the mind-bogglingly lapse of internal logic and a dumbass character named "Topher" and it's a recipe for disaster that rivals "Viva Laughlin" for absurdity.
  • LOST. If ever there was a show where the title perfectly describes the story, it's this one. When I quit watching two years ago, it was greatness that had degenerated into a senseless, meandering pile of FAIL! I can't imagine that it's going to end in a manner that will make the years invested in watching it pay off.
  • HEROES. It's a show about people with super-powers who go out of their way to avoid using super-powers! This leaves us with a boring-ass joke of a show where the only thing to look forward to each week is guessing which character gets to have the FX budget and actually use their power. Like Lost, nobody writing the show has a frickin' clue what to do with the story.
  • CSI: MIAMI. David Caruso is the single worst "actor" on television today, and I simply cannot fathom why anybody would want to be subjected to his "talents." I don't care how amazing the rest of the cast is, Caruso is such a douche that he destroys any chance they have to shine.
  • NCIS. The slapstick bullshit and inane dialogue has smart people acting stupid, stupid, STUPID! It's almost scary how such a great cast and concept can be reduced to sheer idiocy because of failure in implementation. I cannot believe that this show was a spin-off from "JAG" which was such a great show.
  • CHUCK. I hear they gave the whiny bitch kung-fu or something. But a whiny bitch with kung-fu is still a whiny bitch. Watching "Bumbling Chuck" act like a neurotic mess every week is supposed to be entertaining? Not to me it isn't.

OTHER CRAP I WON'T BOTHER WATCHING...

"Dancing With The Stars" - "Two and a Half Men" - "One Tree Hill" - "Gossip Girl" - "Lie To Me" - "Shark Tank" - "The Good Wife" - "90210" - "Melrose Place" - "So You Think You Can Dance" - "Biggest Loser" - "Hank" - "The Middle" - "Eastwick" - "New Adventures of Old Christine" - "Criminal Minds" - "America's Next Top Model" - "Better Off Ted" - "Law & Order: SVU" - "Private Practice" - "CSI" - "The Mentalist" - "Supernatural" - "Bones" - "Fringe" - "Super Nanny" - "Ugly Betty" - "Ghost Whisperer" - "Medium" "Numbers" - "Smallville" - "Brothers" - "'Til Death" - "Desperate Housewives" - "Brothers & Sisters" - "Cold Case" - "The Amazing Race" - "Three Rivers" - "Southland" - "Mercy" - "The Beautiful Life"

   

Here's hoping that most of the new shows I'm trying out will suck horribly so I won't waste too much time watching television!

But no worries. From past experience, I can pretty much count on it.

   

Juicy

Posted on Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009

Dave!I'm in a little bit of a snarky mood tonight.

And that's making it tough to blog, because saying what's actually on my mind would bring me nothing but trouble. Especially since I ran across some reeeeeaally juicy information about a total asshole who has been badmouthing me to cover his own ass. So now I'm in the unique position of being able to humiliate somebody who totally deserves it, all while eliminating a thorn in my side at the same time. But, alas, I'm just not evil enough to press the button. Sure I like to try evil on occasion... but I don't think I'm ready to turn pro and go full-time...

Try Evil!

So I hold my peace.

Resist temptation.

Take the high road.

Be the bigger man.

The better person.

The nice guy.

And try not to regret that I'm not more evil. Because how will I ever conquer the planet if I can't crush my enemies?

Oh well.

In other news... there's an interesting observation over at Ain't It Cool News...

CW darling "Gossip Girl" pulled 2.1 million total viewers last night, while the final season of the CW's "Veronica Mars" averaged 2.5 million viewers three seasons back.

So The CW cancels Veronica Mars, one of the best shows ever to air on television, and is now doing worse in the ratings with their hottest new show. Well, good. It couldn't happen to a nicer network.

Oooh. I'm more than just a little snarky tonight!

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Bi

Posted on Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009

Dave!For over a year now I've had some problems reading things up close and working on my laptop any time it's higher than my actual lap. Things then to go a little blurry, and I thought it might be because my eyes were deteriorating. So I bought a pair of reading glasses and use them from time to time... usually when my eyes get tired. But they're kind of a pain in the ass when I'm used to wearing contacts, and have even been responsible for me almost dying.

So this morning when I went in for my annual eye exam, I asked about it.

My doctor says that my close-up is actually pretty good, and it really shouldn't be necessary for me to go bi yet (as in bifocal glasses). But, in order to humor me, she let me try a pair of these nifty new contact lenses that are magical and all multi-focal and stuff. How they work is actually very cool, as each lens is "zoned" for different functions...

MultiFocal Lens Graphic

How my eye figures out where to look through each lens is a total mystery to me, but Bausch & Lomb has a cool demo to explain the logic. All I know is that they really work, and I am hopeful that I can get used to wearing them because they are just that sweet.

Now all I need is a flying car and my life will be complete.

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Guinness

Posted on Thursday, September 24th, 2009

Dave!Guinness celebrated their 250th anniversary today!

Deliciously wholesome and hearty Irish Guinness Draught.

I can't remember when I had my first pint of Guinness, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't here in the US. It was probably in London and I think it was purchased for me. But even though I don't remember where or when, I do remember most everything else. I remember it was a properly poured pint instead of out of a can or bottle or made by somebody who didn't know what they were doing. I remember it was different and delicious. I remember joking about having to eat it with a spoon because it was so thick. I also remember that I had another.

I still drink Guinness from time to time. Mostly at pubs when I see that they know how to serve it up right.

And, of course, I drop by the Guinness Brewery at St. James's Gate whenever I'm in Dublin...

DAVETOON: Dave and Bad Monkey take the Guinness Factory Tour in Dublin

Once when I was in Ireland, I had some time to kill and so I took the Wild Wicklow Tour where I saw something pretty amazing. The Guinness Estate (owned by the Guinness family) has its own lake... Lough Tay. It's a pretty lake in some very pretty countryside, but that's not what makes it amazing. What makes it amazing is that they imported some white sand for the beach there, which looks something like this...

A photo of Lough Tay's white sand beach.

But to really appreciate what this means, you kind of have to look at it from space. Like this image from Google Maps...

Lough Tay Guinness Lake!

And then need to use your imagination...

Lough Tay Guinness Lake Morph!

And there you have it...

It's a lake that looks like a pint of Guinness!

Pretty cool, huh?

Happy Anniversary, Guinness!

   

Pre

Posted on Friday, September 25th, 2009

Dave!Am I the only one who is scared shitless whenever that freaky woman pops up on television to whore the Palm Pre in their ads?

She's like a drugged-out Borg Queen at an Italian Renaissance fair who is telling you to buy one of her phones or else she's going to stab you while you sleep. She's so frightening that my testicles retreat into my torso whenever she appears. If I were to ever meet her in person, my balls would probably go missing for weeks.

Forget zombies and vampires, HERE'S the Halloween costume to beat this year...

Freaky-Ass Palm Pre Bitch

I've played with the Palm Pre, and it's not a bad smartphone. If the iPhone didn't exist, it would be a serious contender for my mobile of choice. But since the iPhone does exist, Palm felt they couldn't really compete and needed to use scare tactics to sell the thing?

I guess that's one strategy.

In other news... a few people didn't understand what I meant by the whole Guinness on Lough Tay thing, so I added this frame to show how the lake kind of looks like a glass of Guinness...

Lough Tay Guinness Lake Morph!

And that's all for tonight, as I am half-asleep already.

Please don't let me have Palm Pre Bitch nightmares...

   

Sim

Posted on Saturday, September 26th, 2009

Dave!Today as I was driving home from work I saw some dude urinating on the side of the road in plain sight.

I honestly didn't know whether to pull over and shake his hand for such brazen disregard of public health and safety laws... or grab the tire iron out of my trunk and beat him to death for being such a disgusting pig. Not wanting to end up diseased or in jail, I instead laid on my horn as a sign of my contempt and drove onward.

When things like this happen to me, I'm convinced that I've somehow become trapped in a game of The Sims and some god-like gamer is throwing bizarre, absurd, and repugnant stuff my way for sheer entertainment value. Except I'm not amused, so it must be for their entertainment and not mine...

Sim Dave

   
If I'm going to be trapped in a game of The Sims, why couldn't I have been made an astronaut?

Astronaut Dave!

Or at least something a little more exciting. Like a gynecologist... or a porn star... or even a mad scientist? Instead I get a guy peeing on the side of the road?

Life can be so cruel.

Even if it's simulated.

   

Bullet Sunday 150

Posted on Sunday, September 27th, 2009

Dave!Sweet! It's the 150th edition of Bullet Sunday!

• AT&T FAIL! I am quickly becoming disenamoured with the AT&T mobile service for my iPhone. At first, everything was swell and I found the service to be on-par with Verizon, my previous mobile provider. But as more and more people jump on the iPhone bandwagon, AT&T's service keeps getting progressively worse. When I was in Las Vegas, I tried to place a call to Jenny across town (who also has an iPhone). We could not get a call to connect for more than a few seconds no matter how many times we tried. Then when I was in Alaska, I was barely able to make phone calls or use data over Edge in any port. I can only guess that the service is overwhelmed whenever cruise ships pull into port (which must really suck if you're a local). You'd think AT&T would build more capacity for these obviously high-use areas, but no. They don't even have 3G. It's as if AT&T is totally shocked over the massive success of the iPhone, and never bothered to prepare otherwise. Dumbasses. If Apple is smart, they'll choose NOT to renew their exclusive contract with AT&T and spread the congestion around on other networks. Which is where I'll be if AT&T doesn't get their shit together.

   
• Ghosts! I like Halloween for a lot of reasons, bit the biggest? THE CANDY! In addition to Candy Corn, which is one of my favorite sweets, I like all the "fun-sized" versions of my old favorites. Even better is the "special edition" items that are released just for the holiday. Like GHOST DOTS! It's one of the best candies ever...

Ghost Dots Boxes

Dots Ghosties!

Awwww... cute! And delicious! Even though the pieces all look the same, they are actually flavored just like the original DOTS candies. The package says "Which Flavor? Which Ghost? IT'S A MYSTERY!" which just makes a fun candy even better!

   
• Bears! After going through the 317 photos that were worth keeping from my trip to Alaska, I've come to the conclusion that I love bears. Of all the images I took, the pictures with bears are far-and-away my favorites...

Tree Bear

Another Bear in a Tree

Lazy Bear

Hello Lazy Bear!

Lazy Bear Walks Away

One day I've got to plan a vacation that revolves around bear-watching. That would have to be one of the best trips for a photographer ever.

   
• Search Me! Today is Google's 11th birthday! Amazing how in all these years that no other search engine has come along which can touch it. I had hopes that Microsoft's "Bing!" would at least pose a challenge and up the search game, but so far I've been unimpressed. Here's wishing Google more innovation (and a little luck!) for another 11 years.

Goog11e Graphic

   
And now I suppose I really should finish unpacking so I can start re-packing for next week. Life. She is a viscious circle, no?

   

DOTS!

Posted on Monday, September 28th, 2009

Dave!Okay. Yesterday I wrote about the wonderment that is Ghost DOTS!

And now I found something even better. Something so great that it is FUNDAMENTALLY LIFE-CHANGING in its AWESOMENESS!!

Because there is a new Halloween Assortment DOTS Bag which, in ADDITION to Ghost DOTS, also includes Candy Corn DOTS and Bat DOTS!! I know it seems too good to be true, but here they are...

Halloween DOTS!

The Candy Corn DOTS taste kind of like... well... candy corn.

The Bat DOTS look like they'd taste like licorice, but then don't... they taste like Mandarin Blood Oranges!

Both of them are pretty frickin' sweet.

This is shaping up to be the best Halloween ever!

   

Wishful

Posted on Tuesday, September 29th, 2009

Dave!Bleh.

It has been one of those days where nothing went right.

I was hopeful that things would improve once I finally got home tonight, but that was just wishful thinking.

I feel buried.

And lost.

And alone.

DAVETOON: Help!

Fortunately, I'll be leaving soon so I can escape from it all... for just a little while, anyway.

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Amsterdam

Posted on Wednesday, September 30th, 2009

Dave!And I'm off for a wild weekend in DutchyLand with the Bitch that is Dutch...

Bitchsterdam 2009 Poster

   

Also in attendence will be the Lady that is Penelope and the Tai-Tai that is Geeky.

With a roster like this, only time will tell if I manage to survive the event.

Here's hoping that if (by some miracle) I do survive, I'll not be permanently damaged...

   

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