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Puzzled

Posted on Monday, October 1st, 2007

Dave!Given that I don't really blog about anything of actual substance in my life, all the interesting stuff that happened today can't be written about here. Suffice to say that in one day, everything I thought that was going to happen in my life for the next two months has been drastically altered. I'm still sorting through the pieces to determine if this is a good thing or a bad thing, because right now I just don't know. That's the way it goes.

At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Trying my best to roll with the punches, I cleared my evening so that I could attempt to put everything back together again. It was not a happy time, and it was most certainly not easy. And I think a few of the pieces fell in-between the couch cushions, because I can't see the big picture yet.

Life should be more like a Rubik's Cube than a jigsaw puzzle, because then you couldn't misplace any of the pieces...

Davecube

And, more importantly, there's a formula that tells you how to solve it.

Oh well. I've done the best I can.

Though it's entirely possible that everything will change again tomorrow.

Or the next day.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  34 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Cancellation

Posted on Tuesday, October 2nd, 2007

Dave!I managed to get most of my messed-up schedule repaired today. The worst part about it all is having to call and cancel out on people who were counting on me... and some things I was really looking forward to doing had to be given up. I'm trying to make the best of the situation, but sometimes it's hard to find an up-side.

Except when one of the things you're canceling is helping Bad Robert move his furniture out of storage. There's really no down-side to missing out on dragging heavy objects up two flights of stairs. Well, except Robert promised to buy me Taco Bell if I helped, and I love me the Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes (especially when somebody else is paying for them).

Of course, now that I think about it, my restrictive diet wouldn't allow me to have Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes in the first place! I'd be risking my life moving his furniture with no cheese-covered reward at the end! That hardly seems fair now, does it?

Anyway...

While I was backing up my hard drive this morning, I ran across a project that I had started a while back, but never had time to finish. The idea was to come up with some character "style sheets" for Lil' Dave and Bad Monkey, then hire a professional to create 3-D models of them for me. This is a lot harder than it sounds, because translating a 2-D cartoon into 3-D doesn't always work, and you need to find somebody who has a lot of experience doing it. On top of that, it's quite a challenge for me to visualize the characters having depth... I never put any thought of them existing that way while I was slapping them together years ago...

Lil' Dave Style Sheet
Awwwww... cute!

Ooh! Ooh! Reaper is on TV now! I hope that the lead character doesn't turn into a whiny little bitch like what happened with Chuck last night. Boy does that get old in a hurry.

   

Televised

Posted on Wednesday, October 3rd, 2007

Dave!This morning I wake up to my Variety newsfeed and see something so shocking that I very nearly pee myself while squealing like a little girl and crying at the same time... ABC to give 'Cupid' another shot.

My first thought is that ABC is bringing back the best show ever to air on television.

My second thought is that this is wishful thinking, and they have bought the rights to CBS's crappy dating reality show of the same name.

But then I click through to the story, and there it is...

"Rob Thomas to resurrect Jeremy Piven series."

At this point I'm in complete shock. This kind of thing never happens. Television networks rarely (if ever) admit that they've made a massive f#@%ing mistake and set about correcting it. I've written about my love of Jeremy Piven's Cupid many, many times, and the thought of it coming back is almost too much to handle. What's next? They bring back Wonderfalls, Dead Like Me and Arrested Development?

And then I read the story...

Thomas said he was "shocked" by the request -- in a good way. "I'm getting a chance to do what writers never get the chance to do, which is to go back and try to improve a work," he added.
   
  — Wow. Is Rob Thomas high? How can you improve upon perfection? This does not bode well.
   
Scribe said that while he'll write a completely new pilot, "I'm not going to reinvent it. What they're buying is the show."
   
  — Thank heavens for that! Maybe he hasn't gone insane after all.
   
There will be changes, of course.
   
  — FUCK!!!!
   
For one thing, Piven, busy on "Entourage," won't be reprising his role. Thomas also wants to come up with a main title sequence that captures the show's conceit so he doesn't have to explain it every week.
   
  — WHAT THE FUCK?!? CUPID IS JEREMY PIVEN!!! DID ROB THOMAS NOT WATCH HIS OWN SHOW?!? How the fuck can you "not reinvent" the show yet not have Jeremy Piven in it? Cupid without Cupid? And who gives a crap if Jeremy Piven is doing Entourage? He may be the best part of that show, but he's not the lead character! Bring Piven back to Cupid and have him make guest-appearances on Entourage! The show isn't even that good anymore. This is worse news than if they never decided to bring back Cupid in the first place! Maily because IT WON'T BE CUPID WITHOUT JEREMY PIVEN! If HBO had any integrity at all, they would cancel Entourage before it gets too awful, and let Piven go back to Cupid.
   
New "Cupid" will also relocate from Chicago to Los Angeles, allowing for more high-profile stunt casting.
   
  — Yes, well, if you're destroying the show by not bringing back the lead character, what difference does it make where you put it? Chicago was critical to the grounding of the show, and one of the many, many things I loved about Cupid was the constant location shoots in The Windy City, but whatever.
   
"The plan is to try to hook some really good guest stars every week," Thomas said.
   
  — I think I want to die...

So ABC isn't bringing back Cupid after all. Not really. My only hope is that we will at least get the original series out on DVD so they can use it to promote the butchered remake.

The hardest thing for me is that I totally trust Rob Thomas, and the new version of the show is undoubtedly going to be brilliant (the guy did create Veronica Mars and the original Cupid after all). But will that be any consolation to me? Probably not. The original series is the best television show ever, and having a new success on what could have been a stunning comeback just makes me sad.

Which brings me to the best show currently airing on television (TONIGHT 8/7c)...

Pushing Daisies

I've only seen the first episode of Pushing Daisies, but it's so brilliant that the rest of the episodes could be crap and the show would still be genius. Of course, I wouldn't expect anything less from Bryan Fuller (the guy behind the aforementioned Wonderfalls and Dead Like Me), and I am very interested in seeing where he takes this one.

But the show is on ABC... the network that fucked up Cupid, the best show ever to air on television, so I'm not holding my breath. The morons will probably preempt Pushing Daisies a half-dozen times... change the time-slot again and again... demand changes to the show... then blame viewers for not tuning in before ultimately canceling it after five episodes.

It's what they do.

I wish I didn't love television so much.

Categories: Television 2007Click To It: Permalink  26 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Veto

Posted on Thursday, October 4th, 2007

Dave!Did you feel it?

Did you feel it?

If you were anywhere in the Pacific Northwest, you undoubtedly felt the presence of Elizabeth Hurley in Seattle yesterday, signing autographs at Nordstroms to kick off Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Unfortunately, I had a project deadline to meet, so driving over to Seattle so I could stand in line with a bunch of ladies in the cosmetics department and profess my undying love for all things Elizabeth Hurley was not in the cards.

Perhaps it's for the best. Keeping the fantasy alive and all that.

And then there's reality...

I've said before that blogging is not very difficult for me. Whenever I have free time during the day, I just grab my MacBook and type something out. I don't really think about it, and just blog whatever is on my mind. The average entry comes together in about 10 minutes (or a little longer if I have photos to work with or cartoons to draw).

But today was completely different.

Because this morning I read about President Bush's veto of the bipartisan bill to help provide healthcare to children that are from families making too much money to qualify for Medicaid, but too little money to afford insurance.

And then lost my mind.

This is my fifth attempt to put down my thoughts on the matter. The four other times I've tried throughout the day, I just end up typing "FUCK!" every other word and WRITING EVERYTHING IN ALL-CAPS. I'm beyond shock. I'm beyond anger. I can't even feign indifference. George Bush with all his money has never had to worry about how he's going to care for a sick child, and now it's fairly obvious that he doesn't give a fuck about people who do. This was a bill endorsed by both Democrats and Republicans. This was a bill supported by 72% of Americans. This was a bill that would cost relatively little compared to our $13 trillion dollar economy (and is positively paltry when compared to the cost of the war in Iraq). This was a bill that would provide desperately-needed health care coverage to over 9 million children (CHILDREN!!). This was a chance for George Bush to put his personal politics aside and do something for the good of the people he represents... something that a majority of these people are supporting.

But our president apparently doesn't give a fuck. He doesn't give a fuck about parents who can't afford insurance for their kids. He doesn't give a fuck about what Americans want. He doesn't give a fuck the well-being of children. And he certainly doesn't even give a fuck about his fellow Republicans who will be running for office next term, because stuff like this is what will push fence-sitters to vote Democrat.

He just doesn't give a fuck.

President Bush says his reason for killing the bill is because he's trying to halt the federalization of health care... "I don't want the federal government making decisions for doctors and customers." Which just goes to show that on top of not giving a fuck, he's completely clueless as well. Did he even READ the bill before he vetoed it? This program has NOTHING TO DO WITH FEDERALIZING HEALTH CARE!! The program would provide funds for STATE government to enroll children in PRIVATE health insurance plans. Perhaps he actually did read it, he just didn't understand it? I can't decide if that would make me feel better or worse.

I could go on and on. I could unleash my profound disappointment in our president. I could rage about how insane it is that the wealthiest nation on earth can't provide health care for all of its citizens. I could go crazy over how insurance lobbies are dictating policy to our elected officials. I could... but I won't. I don't want to discuss it anymore. I don't want to think about it anymore. I don't want to deal with it anymore. I just don't want to accept that our country is run by somebody so lacking in decency and compassion.

Or maybe it's because I don't give a fuck either.

   

Faculties

Posted on Friday, October 5th, 2007

Dave!Today on my way home from work I pull up to a stop light and suddenly realize that I don't have my iPhone with me. After flying into a total panic, I calm down once I realize that all I have to do is call my iPhone and I'll be able to hear where I left it.

But then I go to reach for iPhone to call myself and realize that there is a slight flaw in my plan. It's times like this that I have to seriously wonder if my mental faculties were permanently damaged from all that marijuana I smoked in the 60's...

Davehippies

Except I wasn't born until 1966 and don't smoke pot, so things must be worse than I thought.

Categories: DaveToons 2007Click To It: Permalink  27 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Expectations

Posted on Saturday, October 6th, 2007

Dave!Bleh. I hate to shop, but had to drive into the city this afternoon so I could run some errands. Usually I would pick a week-day to avoid the crowds, but I didn't have any choice. What a mistake that turned out to be. The mall was frickin' nuts. By the time I got home, I was ready to beat my head against a wall, drink a fifth of vodka, take a handful of sleeping pills, and go into a nice relaxing coma.

In better news, tomorrow is my grandmother's 90th birthday! She's one of the best people I know, and I love her more than my iPhone!

Grandma and Dave
Grandma helping me with my drinking skills during those early years.

Since my grandmother is a hardcore Seattle Mariners baseball fan, we thought it would be fun to surprise her with a Mariners decorated birthday cake. I printed out the Mariner's logo from their web site and gave it to my mother so she could have one made. When she ordered it, she handed over the logo and asked for "Happy Birthday" to be written across the bottom. Today she went to pick it up, and this is what we got...

Grandma Cake

Uhhhh... yeah. I suppose it wouldn't have been so awful if the entire cake wasn't all lopsided. Obviously, we couldn't serve something so heinous for such a special occasion, so we started making desperate phone calls to see if somebody could make us a new cake. That's when we found out that it's illegal for cake decorators to use copyrighted materials (like the Seattle Mariner's logo) to decorate their cakes. Oops.

So I decided for the bakery to just write "Happy Birthday" on the cake and put a border around it. Then I'd go ahead and add the logo myself. The problem is that none of the logos I found on the internet were of high enough resolution to print out for a cake. I thought somebody must have an EPS vector graphic online somewhere, but Googling turned up nothing. I finally gave up and just drew it myself. I tried to find a font to write "Seattle Mariners" around the logo, but couldn't find one that looked right. Ultimately I had to create my own typeface as well...

Marinerfont

To make sure there would be no mistake with how we wanted the cake to look this time, here's what I handed over to the bakery...

Grandma Cake
Logo © ™ ® by the Seattle Mariners

I wrote a note asking them to please do everything except the logo since I'll be adding that myself. I pick up the cake tomorrow morning, so I guess we'll see what happens.

What's cool is that last week I found some officially licensed party supplies to match the cake...

Mariner Party Gear
Merchandise © ™ ® by the Seattle Mariners

What's not cool is how much money officially licensed party crap costs! TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!? I suppose that they have to pay those billion-dollar sports salaries somehow, but TWENTY-FIVE DOLLARS?!? You'd think for that kind of money that the Party Pack would include an actual Seattle Mariner baseball player... or maybe even an Ichiro bobble-head... but you'd be wrong. All you get are plates, napkins, cups, and forks.

That's a pity, because an Ichiro bobble-head would have been totally sweet.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  31 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Bullet Sunday 51

Posted on Sunday, October 7th, 2007

Dave!I'm going fully automatic for Bullet Sunday on Blogography today!

• Science! Yesterday while I was running errands, I dropped by the crafts store for some spray glue. As I was standing in line to pay for my stuff, I saw a kid holding a cardboard "presentation board" which he was using for his Science Fair project. This made me a little bit angry. CARDBOARD? Back when I made my science fair project, I had to use REAL WOOD BOARDS and METAL HINGES and SCREWS. My science fair board weighed a ton, but had the benefit of being indestructible. I pity the fool who uses wimpy CARDBOARD on their science fair project! So this is what people mean when they talk about the "pussification of America!"

Science Fair

• Cake! I ran into Wenatchee to pick up my grandma's cake this morning... it wasn't exactly what we had wanted, but it was a heck of a lot better than what we had the first time (i.e. it was actually cake-shaped). Most important of all, it tasted delicious and everybody liked it. Overall the party went really well, though I did have a weird moment when I walked up and found my grandmother discussing Britney Spears with her sisters. Apparently they're as sick of hearing about her as the rest of us.

• Reamed! Last night I got a nasty piece of hatemail claiming that Blogography glorifies drug use and should be held responsible for encouraging kids to do drugs (among other things). To which I replied "huh?" Turns out this had to do with a story I drew where Bad Monkey got caught trying to smuggle heroin. To which I replied "huh?" I still don't get it. At no point in the cartoon does Bad Monkey (or anybody else) actually use drugs. It's not like I have my monkey shooting-up and throwing a party or anything. Maybe THIS is what people mean then they talk about the "pussification of America?"

Cavity Search

• Chocolate! GAH! I AM SICK OF DARK CHOCOLATE!! They're starting to put that bitter crap on everything! I'm a milk chocolate kind of guy, and it is really frustrating to have to dig through all this dark chocolate junk to find something I want. This morning I bought a package of M&M's that I opened while I was driving home, only to learn that they were M&M's DARK. I didn't notice that I had grabbed a purple bag instead of the brown bag. I only ate that one handful, but I've still got that bitter taste stuck in my mouth nine hours later. Oh how the memory of it haunts me still.

• Bullet! Hey, if this is Bullet Sunday #51, and there are 52 weeks in a year, does that mean next week I'll have been doing Bullet Sunday for a year? Who knew?

Hmmm... I guess that's all she wrote, because the crazy old couple that lives in the mobile home park next door are screaming at each other again, and there's nothing good on television...

Categories: Bullet Sunday 2007Click To It: Permalink  26 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

DaveAir

Posted on Monday, October 8th, 2007

Dave!Today was a totally miserable day, and I don't really feel like blogging.

Except I just can't help myself.

Probably because tomorrow promises to be even worse, but more likely because there's nothing good on television Mondays at 9:00. Once I've watched Chuck and How I Met Your Mother, it's game over.

Today on my way to work I stopped at the mini-mart so I could grab an orange juice. While I was deciding if I wanted pulp or no pulp, I got a call from a number I didn't recognize. "Is Candice there" the guy asked. "Nope, you've got the wrong number" I replied. "When she gets back can you tell her I called?" he said. "You've got the wrong number... there's no Candice here!" I repeated. "Shit!" the guy says "she wrong-numbered me!" Not knowing what else to say, I mumble "yeah, that's a tough break... bye!" and hang up.

Five minutes later, iPhone rings again from the same number. "Dude, there's no Candice here!" I say immediately. "Yeah, I just thought I'd check and make sure I didn't mess up" the guy says. "She must have been pretty special," I offer sympathetically. "Yeah, I thought so... sorry to bother you" he replies awkwardly as he hangs up.

Is it really so hard to just put the poor bastard out of his misery rather than get his hopes up like that?

Relationship head-games are the worst.

And now, before I go, is there anybody out there with a couple billion dollars burning a hole in their pocket? I'm looking for financing to create my own airline. The schedules out of Seattle are not at all convenient for me, and I'm tired of having to take that horrifying 6:00am flight out of Wenatchee to make a connection. On top of that, the planes would look totally bitchin'...

And, as if that weren't enough... you get wider seats, more legroom, in-flight internet, and free chocolate pudding on every flight! Life is better with DaveAir!

   

Road

Posted on Tuesday, October 9th, 2007

Dave!My anticipation that today was going to suck ass somehow made it bearable.

Well, that, and knowing that at the end of the day I would be having dinner at David's Pizza.

The 3-hour drive to Spokane, which was kill-me-now-boring (as always) was made even worse this time because I got a late start and had to navigate the traffic pouring out of the city. For reasons I cannot begin to fathom, some of the stupidest drivers on earth tend to congregate on the single-lane road between Wenatchee (Apple Capitol of the World!) and Quincy (Best Corn on Earth!)...

Spokane Danger Zone

More than once along the way I wanted to drive my car off a cliff so that I wouldn't have to deal with the insanity anymore. Police cars patrol the stretch regularly, but don't seem to do anything about people driving 10mph under the speed limit, or weaving all over the road because they're talking on their mobile phone instead of paying attention to where they're driving. Dumbasses.

Dave Drive-By

And tomorrow I get to do it all over again on the way home!

I'm so excited that I could just shit myself.

But right now there's a new episode of Reaper on, so that will jut have to wait.

UPDATE: Oh great! My hotel's crappy internet connection keeps cutting out. This seems to be happening more and more when I travel anymore. If a hotel has a flakey internet connection, they shouldn't be able to advertise having internet at all, because it's not always true. Bastards.

Categories: Travel 2007Click To It: Permalink  18 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Quizzical

Posted on Wednesday, October 10th, 2007

Dave!Oh! Oh! Oh! OH! OH! OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!

After driving three hours yesterday, all I really wanted to do was get some sleep. I had to get up early this morning, and a good night's rest would go a long way toward my day getting off to a good start. Except I think we all know I'm just not that lucky. Around 1:30am there was a loud bang followed by wild moaning coming from the room behind my headboard. In my groggy state, I first thought that a woman was being killed next door. But after I woke up I realized that it was just a woman being killed next door.

I think she was faking it.

Or she was having the best sex of her life.

Or she was being murdered. I dunno, because it's such a fine line.

And now it's time for...

WHICH IS SCARIER? While shopping for dental floss, I came across something disturbing. Which doll is more terrifying... George Bush or Hilary Clinton?...

Scary!

If you said anything except "both" then you're wrong. They are equally scary, but for very different reasons. And some of the same reasons. All I know is that either doll would scar a child for life.

And now it's time for...

WHAT'S WRONG? Other than the fact that I'm trying to use my camera while driving, what's wrong with this picture?...

Wrongness

If you said "Dave is overdue for his oil change," then you're wrong. Well, you're not totally wrong... I am totally overdue for my oil change, but that's not what I was going for. No, what I was going for was that I am driving 36mph in a 60mph zone here... BECAUSE THE DUMBASS AHEAD OF ME WON'T GO THE SPEED LIMIT! Yet if I were to run them off the road so that they explode in a fiery ball of death and destruction, it would be ME who would be considered the criminal! There is no justice.

And now it's time for...

WHAT'S THE SIGN? After driving past several miles of rocky cliffs, rock-filled walls, barriers constructed out of rock material, and actual rocks, what do you think this sign is going to say?...

Rocky

If you said "Wild Dingo Crossing" then you're wrong. No, the sign that somebody felt was worth spending several hundred dollars to erect here says "ROCKS." Because stating the sublimely obvious is money well spent...

Rocks!

And now, from the "I swear I am not making this stuff up" department, I got another wrong number call while driving back home today...

DAVE: Hello?
   
GUY: Yeah, is Jayden there?
   
DAVE: Nope. Sorry, you've got the wrong number.
   
GUY: So you're not Jayden?
   
DAVE: Not right now.

WTF?? You have the wrong number but you expect to end up talking to the person you were calling anyway?!? How exactly is that supposed to work? Are you calling with a MAGIC phone?

And now I'm going to bed to do do New York Times Crosswords puzzles on my Nintendo DS until I fall asleep. Which will probably be in about 10 minutes.

I hope.

Categories: Travel 2007Click To It: Permalink  38 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Daisies

Posted on Thursday, October 11th, 2007

Dave!Variety has just released the news that the one and only Simon Pegg has signed on to play "Scotty" in J.J. Abram's forthcoming Star Trek film. I didn't think that they could top Zachary Quinto playing "Spock," but this is an absolute genius move. Of course, a terrific cast doesn't guarantee that the movie isn't going to suck ass, but it's certainly looking good so far.

And speaking of good things...

The second episode of Pushing Daisies was absolutely incredible. The show is like a work of art that sucks you into a beautiful, quirky world from which you don't want to escape. I can't think of another show on TV that keeps me smiling from beginning to end like this, and leaves me feeling happy for no reason at all...

Pushing Davies

Of course, this most certainly means that ABC will cancel it, so I have no idea why I'm getting so attached.

Bastard television networks.

Today I was looking through some old papers in a futile attempt to find an important document I've lost. Never saw it, but I found all kinds of crazy stuff that I didn't even know I kept... my favorite discovery being a photocopy of a cartoon I drew years ago. The Sam & Max video game had finally been released for Macintosh, and I was so happy that I drew my own Sam & Max adventure so that I could attach my personal check to it for payment...

(click for a larger version)
Sam and Max!

But that's only half as entertaining as my most favorite spam ever...

To: Abby U. Shaver
From: Mia X. Randle
Subject: Does your penis size ruin your life? Our product will stop that!

   
Have they ever told you this, "Damn it! Your penis is so small!"?
Didn't you just wanna run away?
Don't let women choose sexual toys but not you! Megadik will make you a real man! You must believe in this wonderful preparation!
"Gush! Your penis is impressive!" Isn't that what you just love to hear?
Soon you'll be the only one ladies will want! Megadik is your magic weapon!

The check is in the mail, baby... the check is in the mail...

   

Summary

Posted on Friday, October 12th, 2007

Dave!

Monkey Bird

   

   

Known

Posted on Saturday, October 13th, 2007

Dave!Leave it to Hilly to come up with a new meme I can't refuse. Her "How Well Do You Know Me" entry is a bit more personal than I get here on my blog, but it still seemed like a fun thing to do while catching up on TiVo. Though, since nobody seems to read blogs on the weekend, maybe I should have waited until next week? Probably. Oh well, here we go...

  1. My current dream vacation would be...
    1. Touring through Thailand, Cambodia, and Vietnam.
    2. Taking an icebreaker cruise to Antarctica from South America.
    3. Exploring the Amalfi Coast of Southern Italy.
    4. A trip from Brisbane to Sydney to Melbourne in Australia.
  2. My biggest pet peeve is...
    1. People clipping their fingernails (or toenails) in public.
    2. People making crunching noises while eating in TV commercials.
    3. People that let their kids run wild and unsupervised.
    4. People who smack their gum while chewing it.
  3. No matter how bad I feel, doing this one thing will make me feel happy every time...
    1. Painting a scenic picture in watercolors.
    2. Bitch-slapping random idiots at the grocery store.
    3. Watching the last 5 minutes of the movie Millions by Danny Boyle.
    4. Eating a bowl of chocolate pudding with a stack of graham crackers.
  4. My DaveToon sidekick character of Bad Monkey is based on...
    1. Robert, my motorcycle-riding psychotic friend.
    2. Max, the homicidal rabbit from Sam & Max.
    3. Curious George, friend of the Man in the Yellow Hat.
    4. Calvin from Bill Watterson's Calvin & Hobbes.
  5. The first blogger I ever met in person is...
    1. Jenny from Run Jen Run.
    2. Jeff from Geekable.
    3. Kazza from Kazza the Blank One.
    4. Kevin from Kapgar.
  6. Total number of webfeeds I read, and the number of those that are personal blogs...
    1. 188 / 131.
    2. 227 / 170.
    3. 362 / 256.
    4. 390 / 316.
  7. The traits I most admire in people is...
    1. Honesty & Intelligence.
    2. Conviction & Compassion.
    3. Bravery & Strength.
    4. Hotness & Charisma.
  8. The person I would most like to beat severely with a baseball bat...
    1. Jared Fogle, the Subway Sandwich Whore.
    2. Doug Morris, CEO of Universal Music.
    3. Ann Couter, evil incarnate.
    4. Pat Robertson, hate-preaching bastard.
  9. The travel guru I most like to use as a resource for planning my trips...
    1. The Travel Channel's Samantha Brown.
    2. 1000 Places to See Before You Die author Patricia Schultz.
    3. Famous travel writer and TV personality Rick Steves.
    4. Brilliant travel storyteller Bill Bryson.
  10. My greatest phobia would be...
    1. Nosocomephobia: Fear of hospitals.
    2. Entomophobia: Fear of insects.
    3. Ophidiophobia: Fear of snakes.
    4. Acrophobia: Fear of heights.

Here's the really strange thing... on some of these, I don't even know what my answer will be!

Categories: Memes 2006Click To It: Permalink  29 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Bullet Sunday 52

Posted on Sunday, October 14th, 2007

Dave!w00t! This wraps up one year of Bullet Sunday here at Blogography! I started it as a way to post about all the little things that happen during my week that aren't big enough to merit an entry of their own. It was a good plan, but rather than keeping track of little things throughout the week, I always end up waiting until the last minute where I have to struggle to think up something. Oh well. I've grown to like Bullet Sunday, so I guess it will be sticking around.

• Sauce! While I was shopping for ingredients to make burritos last night, I was in the Mexican food aisle listening to a woman yell at her kid for picking up a bottle of hot sauce. "Put that back! We can get that for free at Taco Bell!" she says. I can't help but wonder if she gets her ketchup from McDonalds.

• Aquaman! A TV show I've always wanted to see but never got around to was the Aquaman pilot (made by the same people responsible for Smallville.) Last night I couldn't sleep and finally got around to seeing it. Much to my surprise, it was actually pretty good! Now I'm sad that the show was never picked up for a series... it may not have been entirely faithful to the comic book, but was pretty entertaining and had real potential.

The cool thing about the show is that Aquaman doesn't take things too seriously. He's your average slacker beach-bum that just happens to be able to breath underwater, swim fast, and talk to fish. But when when the shit hits the fan, he's kind of a bad-ass too... like stabbing evil harpy bitches in the head! Sweet! I also like that there are subtle nods to the source material... like Aquaman wearing Orange and Green like in the comic book. If you want to check it out, you can buy it at iTunes for $1.99 or watch it on Joost for free.

• Alpha Flight! Speaking of comics... when I was in Spokane last week, I picked up the two trade paperbacks collecting the "all new, all different" Alpha Flight series that Marvel released in 2004. Despite the fact that it was widely criticized and cancelled after only 12 issues, I really liked the series, and am glad to have the trades to read again. Compared to some of the crappy books that are being released today, the imagination and clever dialogue shown in Alpha Flight is a breath of fresh air... even though it's three years old...

Alphaflight

• Spam of the Day! "Start a new life with beautiful large and firm breasts!" — Hmmm... while that most certainly would be the start of a new life for me, I think I'll pass. And while it might be funny when a guy gets sent an email for breast enlargement, I can't help but wonder if these spamming assholes even give a shit when their unsolicited, unwanted crap lands in the inbox of a woman who has had to undergo a mastectomy or other breast-related trauma? I long for the day that spammers are held accountable for their abhorrent actions, and finally have to face the consequences for the evil that they do.

• Quiz! Yesterday's "How well do you know Dave?" quiz is still open. I hope to dish out the answers tomorrow, but may have to wait until Tuesday if my Monday gets too crazy.

And just like that, one year of Bullet Sunday comes to a close.

   

Vlogged

Posted on Monday, October 15th, 2007

Dave!Alrighty then... it's my first video entry!

I recorded everything this morning, but didn't post until the afternoon so I could transcribe the audio. This way, anybody who might be deaf or hard of hearing will be able to follow along. This has the side-benefit of also helping out those people who can't play movies on their computer, or those terrified at the thought of having to watch me on video (and who could blame them?).

You'll have to forgive the crummy video quality, because it was recorded with my mini iSight camera with crappy lighting. While you're at it, you might as well forgive the bad audio and horrible graphics as well. This video is total crap, and should be avoided at all costs.

But if you're a glutton for punishment, look behind the curtain...

A video transcript is in an extended entry...

→ Click here to continue reading this entry...

Categories: Memes 2006Click To It: Permalink  54 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Confessions

Posted on Tuesday, October 16th, 2007

Dave!Ooh! Look at me! I'm blogging on my lunch break!

It seems everywhere I go, bloggers are making confessions. Kevin confesses to murder. Vahid confesses he has no idea what's going on in Burma. Dustin confesses his secret longing for a Mac. Amanda confesses she didn't have the brain she thought she did. Foo Diddy confesses she can't whistle or chew gum. And Ms. Sizzle confesses her undying love for me (though, to be honest, you really have to read between the lines on that one).

It's all a little intimidating, and I feel I really should be confessing something too.

So here we go...

I totally want to go to a Spice Girls concert on their new world tour...

Dave Spice... GIRL POWER!
Dave Spice says GIRL POWER!! Zigazig ha!

Don't ask me why, because even I don't know.

All I do know is that if I could get tickets and if I could squeeze it into my schedule, I would SO be there.

And in non-confessional news... thanks to everybody for their nice comments on my vlog entry yesterday. For anybody who's curious, here's a Vlogging FAQ...

  • The entire video was unscripted and, with one exception, each scene was done in one take.
  • The exception was the answer to "Who I would most like to beat with a baseball bat." It was originally several minutes long, because I felt compelled to give examples of why these people were so horrible. On the second take I eliminated my examples, but almost got caught up in the moment and started ranting about why Jared Fogle is a total douche. That's why there's that pause before I say "...is not cool."
  • Everything was recorded on my MacBook Pro's built in microphone and iSight camera using iMovie 06 (the newer iMovie 08 sucks monumental ass, and I am really pissed at Apple for taking a great program and making it crappy).
  • The graphics were done in Apple's Keynote software. I remain puzzled as to why sometimes the cool special effects exported to the movie and other times they did not. I guess it's a bug.
  • The song I was singing while eating my Quaker Oatmeal Squares cereal is the theme song from New York City's Watchdog's Cereal Wednesdays.
  • Along with my fear of blood, I also have a fear of needles, making a career as a doctor a bit dicey.
  • Now that I think about it, I probably would be afraid of a snake if it were biting me.
  • I should have mentioned that Samantha Brown's latest travel series, Passport to Latin America, begins October 28th. I haven't been to Latin America yet so, needless to say, I am really looking forward to it. More details are available at the Travel Channel website.
  • When I was recording the video, I struggled to keep it under 10 minutes so I could post it to YouTube. When I ended up going 30 seconds over the limit I was going to cut the shower scene, but found out Google Video allows movies to be over 10 minutes.
  • Yes, dropping the shampoo bottle in the shower was staged. If I didn't do it, I would have had to sing the rest of Madonna's Like A Virgin, and I don't think anybody wants that. Especially me.
  • On top of that, the scene was an homage to a DaveToon I really like. It's also a reference to my trip to Vegas with Bad Robert... but you'll have to wait for my book to read about that one.
  • My vlog entry took more time than any other entry I've ever done... over an hour to make the graphics and film the scenes... so it's not something I will be doing very often.

And lastly, before I forget, everybody needs to go vote for Obi-Steven over at Kimberly's blog. I'd ask you to vote that she gets a web-feed as well, but I can't find a place to vote for that.

   

Seek

Posted on Wednesday, October 17th, 2007

Dave!Today as I was driving home for a quick errand, I saw a guy standing in front of the bank at the center of town holding a sign that said SEEK PEACE AND PURSUE IT. "Well that's nice of him," I thought as I drove by. Peace is a good thing.

Returning to work I had a few minutes left, so I walked some packages over to the post office. Once I got there, I listened as two people in the lobby discussed the guy in front of the bank. This, in itself, was not surprising. I live in a small and highly conservative town, and an event like this is major news.

No, what was surprising is what they were saying.

They were discussing how "there was a time when any hippie protesters would have been run out of town."

The reason I found this surprising was because I assumed my hometown had always been a part of the United States of America, where freedom of expression reigns (or is supposed to, anyway). This is a valid assumption when you consider that Cashmere was incorporated in 1904, which is well after Washington became our 42nd state in 1889.

But I digress...

What really got me going was when the conversation turned bizarre.

They started discussing how things like this were going to become more and more common as more and more people abandoned God.

How predictable.

Not able to contain myself, I simply had to say something...

DAVE: Uhhh... the sign he was holding is a quote from The Bible.
   
MORON: What?
   
DAVE: The guy you're talking about was holding up a quote from The Bible... it's like a famous Psalm... "seek peace and pursue it."
   
MORON: (laughs)
   
DAVE: So he hasn't abandoned God, he's actually trying to get people to follow God's Word.
   
MORON: (laughing) Well I doubt that!!
   
DAVE: No, it's true. Maybe next time you go to church you can look it up.

The irony of my Buddhism-embracing self knowing The Bible better than many so-called Christians is not lost on me here... I'd just expect that anybody who was so quick to label a person as a godless hippie protester might have at least skimmed The Bible before passing such judgement.

Though, if they actually had studied The Bible, they might have picked up on that whole "judge not lest ye be judged" thing (which isn't actually a demand not to judge, but is instead an edict to not judge unfairly, which is exactly what was happening here).

Hey! I was right!

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  37 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Stalker

Posted on Thursday, October 18th, 2007

Dave!

DaveStalker Button!

Categories: Blogging 2007Click To It: Permalink  26 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Phraseology

Posted on Friday, October 19th, 2007

Dave!Two weeks ago, I made an appointment for this morning at 9:00am to see if my satellite TV could be upgraded. I received a phone call yesterday confirming this appointment. This morning I get a call at 8:50am telling me that they don't have the equipment and have to reschedule.

WTF?!? They certainly knew they didn't have the equipment yesterday... why the hell didn't they call me then? Why wait until I've already scheduled my day to call and totally f#@%-up my plans? This kind of thing is completely unacceptable, yet is so commonplace in the repair/installer industry that I don't understand how anything ever gets done.

Dumbasses.

Seattle Blogger Meet
Well, not after last week's game, but we'll see...

The good news is that the weather cleared up a bit for my drive over to Seattle. And speaking of Seattle... on Sunday the 28th of October, I am flying back from the east coast and staying downtown. I know that Sunday isn't the best day for this kind of thing, but would any Seattle bloggers want to get together for an early dinner in the city? I have to work on Monday morning, so I can't stay out until midnight or anything, but it still might be fun to get together. My email address is in my sidebar, let me know if you would be able to come. I'm thinking 4:30-ish, so we have plenty of time to visit and stuff.

And lastly, before I head out the door... a meme!

Bre (of "Win or Lose, We Go Shopping" fame) has come up with a list the words or phrases she uses too often. Then Hilly posted her list too, and a meme was born. Below is a list of the 15 things I find myself saying (or typing) far too often...

  1. "The Whole Taco" Which I use instead of "the big picture" to mean "everything." — e.g. "You can't obsess on the details, you have to look at the whole taco!" or "This is only part of my blogroll... click here for the whole taco."
  2. "Wrecked" Takes the place of "broken" and "sucks" for me. — e.g. "I fell and wrecked my back!" or "Windows Vista is wrecked."
  3. "Totally" Rarely used in conversation, but constantly used while writing, as a modifier to signify extremeness. — e.g. "I would so totally go to a Spice Girls concert!" and "Windows Vista is totally wrecked!"
  4. "Sweet" Which took the place of "cool" and "awesome" for me. — e.g. "Your new iPhone is sweet!" or "My trip to Vegas was totally sweet!"
  5. "Serious" Another modifier to signify extremeness, and is often hyphenated (much like some people are using "crazy" now-a-days). — e.g. "Elizabeth Hurley is serious-hot!" or "Chocolate pudding is serious-delicious."
  6. "Bank" Which took the place of "money" for me. — e.g. "That Porsche must cost some serious bank!" or "I wanted to fly to Paris for the weekend, but didn't have the bank."
  7. "Bitch" Mostly used with inanimate objects (as opposed to people) to express frustration. — e.g. "This bitch is the wrong size!" or "How do I get this bitch to turn on?"
  8. "Bitches" Takes the place of "people" or "friends" for me. — e.g. "Those bitches are going to be late!" or "Hey bitches, thanks for the birthday presents!"
  9. "Whore" Used to indicate that you'll say, do, or buy anything a person or company wants you to. &mdash e.g. "I just bought the new iPod even though I already own four of them... I am such an Apple Whore!" or "Jared Fogle, the Subway Sandwich Whore."
  10. "Touched Down" Used to mean the time that something happened. — e.g. "Apple just touched down with new iPod models!" or "That new television show touched down three weeks ago."
  11. "Hurricane" A person who causes frustration, destruction, problems, or disgust... mostly due to their being annoying. — e.g. "I wish they would fire Hurricane Caruso from CSI Miami so it would be watchable!" or "Hurricane Britney just lost custody of her kids!" or "Hurricane Trump just touched down with a new building in Chicago."
  12. "Weather Delay" Used to describe ANY problem or when something is totally fucked-up (just like the airlines use!) and often used with "Hurricane" (see above). — e.g. "My stupid Windows Vista machine is experiencing a weather delay... AGAIN!" or "Sorry I'm late, there was a weather delay in the parking garage." or "Hurricane Bush has caused a serious weather delay in Iraq."
  13. "Heinous" Seriously bad. So bad that there's no justification for it. — e.g. "David Caruso's 'acting' is heinous." or "The CW Network's heinous cancellation of 'Veronica Mars' haunts me to this day."
  14. "Delusional" Somebody who routinely says something unbelievable, unrealistic, or just plain stupid. — "Pat Robertson says that Hurricane Katrina was the wrath of God on the sinners of New Orleans... he's delusional that way." or "Ann Coulter is totally serious-delusional."
  15. "Dude" I rarely say this anymore except when I'm having a conversation with Bad Robert, in which case we both use it constantly to refer to each other. — "Dude! We should totally order out pizza and play Xbox this weekend!" and "Dude! I know! I so totally have to kick your ass in Halo3! and "Dude! Dream on!" and "Dude! I can SO kick your ass in Halo3!" and "Dude! You're delusional!"

I'm sure there are many more (I am forever using the phrase "well that sucks!," for example) but these are probably the ones that annoy other people the most.

And, on that note, I'm off...

Categories: Memes 2006Click To It: Permalink  13 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Workless

Posted on Saturday, October 20th, 2007

Dave!For the first time in months, I've made it through an entire day without working. Instead I played games with friends, ate pizza, and sat on my ass watching television.

I could totally get used to this.

Alas, it's not to be. Tomorrow morning I head back home and spend all my Sunday working twice as hard so I can catch up from the day I missed. Life is harsh like that.

But, in the meanwhile, I'm planning on getting a good night's sleep. That would be another thing I haven't done in months...

Dave Sleep

Goodnight!

   

Bullet Sunday 53

Posted on Sunday, October 21st, 2007

Dave!So this would be the start of Bullet Sunday: Year Two. And this week I'm posting the bullets from my iPhone! Still don't know how to do images for iPhone entries though. I'll have to look into that one of these days.

• Seattle... In addition to the Seahawks win today, I was pleasantly surprised to find that more people than expected are interested in an early dinner blogger-meet in Seattle next Sunday. I will send out an email with more details soon, and look forward to seeing everybody!

• Blogography... When I first thought of using "Blogography" as the name of my "new" blog back in March of 2002, a Google search returned no results for the word. So I bought the domain and, after a few false starts, the rest is history. Now a Google search shows that there are dozens (if not hundreds) of sites on the web named "Blogography." This doesn't bother me at all, because it only makes my internet identity stronger as more and more people become familiar with the term (it's like free advertising!). This is all fine and good until one of these other "Blogography" sites starts ranting about how my blog is stealing their traffic. This had me starting to feel all sympathetic... until I noticed that their blog was only three months old. Jeez, buddy. Come up with something unique, and maybe you wouldn't have this problem.

• Stalked... I'm having fun updating my Twitter and Flickr feeds throughout the day. It isn't nearly as time consuming as I had expected, because I am usually sending stuff at times where I have nothing better to do anyway... like sitting at a stoplight or talking on the phone or whatever. Anybody who wants to follow along with my daily insanity can do so on my DaveStalker™ Page. Later in the week I've got some traveling going on, so it should prove interesting to see how the updates go then.

• iPhone... Still totally in love with my iPhone after all these weeks. I use it constantly, and am amazed that I am still finding things I didn't know (Image Capture, which comes with MacOS X, will offload iPhone images!) and things I didn't think I could do (you can use iPhone functions, like notepad, while talking to somebody over speakerphone!). It's just ridiculously cool. And yet... I still have two things that bother me: the crappy camera (unless lighting is absolutely perfect, your images will look awful because there's no way to adjust exposure that I can find) and lack of GPS (how much sweeter would Google Maps be if it knew where you were?). Hopefully Apple will be addressing these points in future-models.

• Buttons... Tim informed me Friday that the replacement part for our button machine arrived, so anybody with buttons on back-order with the Artficial Duck Store should have them by the end of the week! At last!

Hmmm... Sunday Bullets are kind of boring without pictures.

   

Evacuated

Posted on Monday, October 22nd, 2007

Dave!The scary news out of Southern California is really messing with my head... inserting horrifying flashbacks into my brain from the two times I had to face a fire.

The first was around 15 years ago while I was living in Wenatchee. Fire was charging down the mountain towards my apartment complex, and I was running around with a garden hose putting out small fires on my roof and nearby shrubs. Eventually, I was forced to evacuate by the fire department, not knowing whether or not my home would be there when I got back. Turns out it was still there (though everything around it was burned up). I woke up in the middle of the night smelling smoke for years after.

The last time was just three years ago. Since I was blogging then, the experience was documented...

Olalla Fire

Though I once again escaped unscathed, it only added to my fire trauma. To this day, I still wake up smelling smoke and thinking that I'm in the middle of a fire every once in a while.

So when I see what Southern Californians are going through, I can totally sympathize. Been there. Done that. Twice.

Hmmm... guess I'll have to save that entry on spoons I was writing for another time... because right now I am desperately hoping I can get some sleep. Even if I have to self-medicate to get it.

Hopefully my dreams will be smoke-free.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  15 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Reality

Posted on Tuesday, October 23rd, 2007
I am not a big fan of reality television. I watch Survivor because, as an original, I still find it to be entertaining... but all of the lame reality shows that followed have done nothing but clog up the television schedule and take time away from actual TV shows. About the only thing that changes my mind are part-reality shows like Project Runway and Top Chef where there's some talent involved. I keep hoping that reality TV will lose popularity and fade away, but it doesn't seem to be happening.

And just when I think it can't get any worse than crap like Flavor of Love and Temptation Island, along comes Kid Nation...

Kid Nation

From the non-stop commercials that CBS has been subjecting me to, I can see that this obviously-staged "reality" show features a load of "unsupervised" kids going crazy in a Lord of the Flies type society of their own making (yeah, right). Well whatever. If I wanted to watch kids screaming and being idiots, I'd go to the mall. THIS is what passes for entertainment now-a-days?

Which brings us to...

The top five things I would rather do than watch an episode of Kid Nation.

  1. Eat a tub of lard.
  2. Have sex with Ann Coulter.
  3. Run down the street in diapers while making "whoop whoop" noises and painting duckies on mailboxes (which, come to think of it, would probably be less crazy than having sex with Ann Coulter).
  4. Stick my penis in a Cuisinart (which, come to think of it, would probably cause less damage than sticking it in Ann Coulter's toxic vagina).
  5. Blow my brains out with a shotgun (which, come to think of it, would probably be better for my health than having sex with Ann Coulter).

Thank heavens that Pushing Daisies has been given a full-season order instead of being canceled for a new reality show called "Bitches Do Stupid Shit For Money" or whatever (wasn't that the original title for The Bachelor?). At least I know that there will be something worth watching later this season.

Categories: Television 2007Click To It: Permalink  31 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Wrong!

Posted on Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

Dave!Why am I such a magnet for wrong numbers? I get them all the time on both my mobile and home phones. This morning I'm interrupted eating breakfast at 6:20am by a ringing phone. I rush into the living room so I can answer it, and am immediately greeted with a stream of unintelligible Spanish the minute I say hello. "YOU'VE GOT THE WRONG NUMBER," I yell, but that only gets me more high-volume rapid-fire Spanish I can't understand. Totally irate now, I scream "Wrong number! Número equivocado! Número equivocado! NÚMERO EQUIVOCADOOOOOOO!!!" and slam down the phone.

I fully believe that if you get a wrong number from somebody, you should have the option of punching a code into your phone and it will charge the stupid fucker $25 for the interruption. Sometimes, if the person is nice and apologetic, it doesn't bother me too much. But most of the time wrong numbers just piss me off because the callers are idiots and I wants to get paid.

Being able to shoot a gun through the phone at wrong-number-dialing ass-clowns would be okay too...

Wrongnumber1

Wrongnumber2

Wrongnumber3

Blargh.

And now I have to pack my suitcase... well, two suitcases, actually... for my trip tomorrow.

Hopefully packing will tire me out and I'll be exhausted enough to finally get some sleep.

At which point I'm sure I'll be woken up by some moron who can't dial a phone number correctly.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  22 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Dunes

Posted on Thursday, October 25th, 2007

Dave!A couple of weeks ago, a sad realization hit me like a bitch-slap across the face... I'm finding it harder and harder to maintain a happy outlook on life. At first I couldn't figure it out. I seemed to be miserable for no good reason. But after taking a little "me-time," I finally decided that my life was badly out of balance...

What my life used to be about: Looking forward to the things I want to do.

What my life seems to be about now: Dreading the things I have to do.

Since then, I've been trying to put my life back in balance by forcing myself to make time for stuff I want to do. This, naturally, is much easier than it sounds, but it has the benefit of being cheaper than therapy.

The trick is trying to figure out what I want to do.

Unfortunately, it turns out that what I really want to do is drive one of those NASA moon buggies across the dunes of Mars in the first manned mission to the red planet.

Which means I'm pretty much screwed, because the odds of me going to Mars are fairly slim.

But I'm trying my best to compensate for it by doing other little things I think I might enjoy.

Tonight I bought myself a hot-fudge sundae for dessert, for example.

It's no trip to Mars, but it sure was tasty.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  22 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Travler

Posted on Friday, October 26th, 2007

Dave!I am frickin' tired.

So frickin' tired that I couldn't even muster the energy to drive to the local Apple Store so I could score a copy of the latest and greatest Macintosh operating system that was released today: Mac OS X 10.5 Leopard. And for a total Mac whore like me to pass on a huge event like this, you know that I have to be close to dead.

Part of me blames the fact that I'm getting older. But most of me blames the shitty state of air travel today.

For the most part, air travel has been ruined by four things... 1) the airlines themselves with their never-ending delays, over-bookings, decreasing legroom, etc., 2) crazy-stupid security measures that don't actually make us any safer, 3) fellow travelers who are dumbasses, and 4) these same dumbasses talking too loudly in their mobile phones (I haven't had a trip in years where I haven't wanted to kill at least one idiot who was annoying the shit out of everybody while talking on their mobile phone at full volume).

It's gotten so bad that I'm a total wreck when I arrive at my destination. I'm so full of all-consuming rage that I can barely function. By the time I started work today I was in no real condition to do any actual work, which just made me all the more insanely angry. Let's see if unloading in my blog will help. That's what a blog is for, isn't it?

  • To the moron in the security line SHRIEKING into his fucking mobile phone at Pangborn Field... Shut up. SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!
  • To Alaska Airlines... I applaud your investment in upgrading your check-in counters at Seattle Tacoma International Airport into an "airport of the future." I think it's truly wonderful that you are working to reduce wait times and process your customers through check-in as quickly and efficiently as possible. Bravo. However... what good is a 5-minute check-in if you're just going to have to wait in line at SeaTac security for 40 minutes? Any plans to kick the Port of Seattle in the ass to get them to open up more lines at the security checkpoints? Now THAT would be an "airport of the future."
  • To the gentleman using the urinal next to me in the South Satellite... After a point, it's just playing with yourself.
  • To the old hag in the waiting area SCREECHING on her fucking mobile phone at SeaTac... Shut up. SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!!
  • To the crazy bitch cackling in the gift shop. I understand that you have found something to be funny, but your deranged, high-pitched cackle-laugh busting my eardrums every two minutes is going to get you strangled to death one day. Calm down or take some fucking meds to control your deranged squealing or you will be killed for it sometime in the near future.
  • To the clutzy bastard sitting behind me on the plane who spilled a bottle of whiskey all over the back of my seat... Thanks a lot dumbass, the plane smelled like the floor of a frat house for the entire trip.
  • To Memphis International Airport... Can't get the jetway to work AGAIN? Seriously, what the fuck? What the bloody fuck? This same damn thing happened the last time I flew into Memphis! Either fix your busted-ass jetways or train your people how to operate them properly.
  • To the stupid bitch YELLING into her fucking mobile phone at Memphis International baggage claim... Shut up. SHUT UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!! Nobody gives a flying fig about your crap, so take your stupid shit outside where we don't have to listen to it.

Hmmm... I don't think I feel better at all. In fact, I think I'm even more mad than I was when I started this entry.

I need to do something fun this weekend so I can forget about all this drama.

Fortunately, I think I might just have the solution...

Categories: Travel 2007Click To It: Permalink  21 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Leopard

Posted on Saturday, October 27th, 2007

Dave!MacOS X 10.5 Leopard is mine at last.

It's been a while since I had looked at the Leopard Developer Build, but the finished product seems pretty much the same to me. After working with it for a few hours, I can say that I am pretty happy with the upgrade. There are several new features and cool tools that make the $199 I spent for the "5 User Family Pack" worth the money (it's $129 if you are upgrading a single machine). Most of my problems with Leopard are aesthetic in nature (the new folder icons are heinous and indistinguishable, the new Dock is a mess, and the new translucent menu bar is confusing, to name a few)... this is probably a good thing, because they will be the easiest to fix (just waiting for a new version of CandyBar!).

So way to go Apple! After how badly Microsoft wrecked Windows with Vista, it's nice to see that Mac users aren't going to be suffering the same fate. I'm loving Leopard...

Daveleopard

And now it's time to put the computer away and go play...

Categories: Apple Stuff 2007Click To It: Permalink  4 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Avitableween

Posted on Sunday, October 28th, 2007

Dave!Now THAT was a party!

When I first received Avitable's invitation to his annual Halloween party, I knew I wanted to go... I just didn't know how I was going to work it into my schedule. But where there's a will, there's a way, and I managed to get everything moved around so I could fly down to Orlando for a single day(!) and attend.

Boy was it worth it. Dozens of people showed up, and Adam went all-out... transforming his entire home into a zombie-infested house of horrors. What was remarkable is the sheer amount of detail that went into the planning of it. So many little touches that made the entire experience perfect...

Avitableween

I'm giving all my photos to Avitable so he can post them (it's his party, after all), but thought I'd share some images of your's truly from the event. The costume I made was of "Holovirus-Insane Rimmer" from the brilliant British series Red Dwarf. It's one of my favorite shows ever, and this character was featured in one of my favorite episodes ever. And, as if that wasn't enough, it's got Mr. Flibble, the psychotically evil penguin hand-puppet in it...

Dave and Mr. Flibble

The idea was that the geekier people at the party would recognize my character and get a laugh out of it... but even people who had no idea what Red Dwarf was would find it funny as well (but for an entirely different reason). Here's me and Avitable...

Avitable and Dave

And me and Marilyn Monroe Miss Britt...

Dave and Ms. Britt

And me with an anatomically scary Mr. Fab (Mr. Flibble was hypnotized by his piece!)...

Dave and Mr. Fab!

A big thanks to Avitable for the invite and for throwing such a fantastic Halloween bash!

Avitable's Halloween Bash!

And now I really should take a nap before I have to go to the airport in four hours. Later today there's a blogger meet in Seattle.

Hmmmm... looks like I'll be blog-partying from coast to coast today.

   

Daveattle

Posted on Monday, October 29th, 2007

Dave!It seems strange that I've attended several blogger meets around the country but have somehow managed to overlook the major metropolitan city right here in my back yard... SEATTLE!

Well, last night that was finally rectified as the very first Daveattle Blogger Meet-Up was held. Unfortunately, it was kind of last-minute and had to happen on a Sunday, but people were kind enough to show up anyway...

Daveattle Lanyard

It was a great group of bloggers and a fun meet...

Dinner was most excellent at Capitol Hill's Elysian Brewing Company...

Daveattle Crowd
Sizzle, Me, Rick, Kristin, Rick's wife Julie, Tracy, and Tracy's friend Holly

Thanks again to everybody who took time out of their weekend to hang-out with me, and I hope we can do it again next summer!

Meanwhile, on the television front...

This was my last episode of Chuck. How in the hell could such a brilliant concept be so utterly and totally ruined so quickly? I am so f#@%ing tired of Chuck being such a whiny little bitch ALL THE TIME. He has two modes... 1) scared and 2) nervous... and I am sick to death of them both. When a series called "Chuck" would be a better show without Chuck, what's the point?

Back to work...

   

Effort

Posted on Tuesday, October 30th, 2007

Dave!It says a lot when I'm in a great city like Seattle, but am so tired after work that I can't manage to muster up the energy to do anything more than climb into bed after dinner. In fact, it was a monumental effort just to turn on my MacBook so I could blog this entry. Heaven only knows where I'll find the strength to turn on the television so I can watch Reaper tonight.

On the up-side, I'm depending on my exhaustion to provide me a decent night's sleep...

Goodnight.

I hope.

Categories: DaveLife 2007Click To It: Permalink  13 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

Masked

Posted on Wednesday, October 31st, 2007

Dave!Ooh, look! SJ from Pseudotherapy came up with a new Hallowmeme... Behind The Mask: Who's That Blogger?

The Official Rules: "This is, appropriately, a meme of many faces. The basic idea is to present info on other bloggers and see how many of your readers can guess who’s who. What info and how you present it is entirely up to you! Choose your victims (famous or obscure, as you wish), decide on a concept and get busy!"

As a visual-type person, I decided to snap a small square from everybody in my "Bloggers I've Met" list (found either in my Home Page Sidebar or my Blogroll Page) and see how many of them people could guess...

Behind The Mask

I think I could probably guess most of them... but there's three or four that might give me some trouble.

Happy Halloween everybody!

Categories: Memes 2006Click To It: Permalink  27 Comments: Click To Add Yours!  

   

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